Shopping
…Because of what happened yesterday, I had been suspended from streaming for a full day. It stung quite a bit, but I still counted myself lucky it was only that.
"Yes, I'm heading out now."
It was a day off from streaming anyway. Back when I moved, Yubin had helped me out, and we'd promised to hang out sometime in return. Today was that day. The moment the month turned over she'd started nagging me to hang out, and to shut her up I'd scheduled the earliest possible date — and of course it happened to land right on my suspension.
Still, no matter how neatly everything lined up, I couldn't do anything about this bitter feeling in my chest. Me, getting suspended…! My manager had even consoled me, saying it was a natural disaster beyond anyone's control. A natural disaster!
"Sigh…"
If I kept dwelling on the incident, yesterday's… scene would come crawling back into my head, so I hurriedly forced my mind onto a different subject.
"Shopping, huh…"
Today's agenda was shopping at a department store. I'd tried repeatedly to talk her out of it — arguing that since I wasn't going to buy a single stitch of clothing, we should do literally anything else — but Yubin's iron will prevailed, and shopping it was. At least I'd made myself clear in advance: even if she pestered me into a fitting room, I wasn't trying anything on. So it should be fine… probably.
And so I left the house and met Yubin at the café where we'd agreed to rendezvous.
"Yeonwoo!"
"Hello."
"Hey! It's been forever!"
"Sorry? It's been less than a month since we last saw each other, hasn't it?"
"Huh? A month isn't forever?"
…The inner-circle sense of time remains a mystery to me. In my book, meeting twice a year still counted as staying in touch…
"Did you order yet?"
"Nope! I was waiting to see what you wanted!"
"Oh, really? Then I'll have a vanilla latte."
"Oh! Me too! We're so in sync, aren't we~?"
"Ah. Yes."
We ordered nothing but coffee, picked it up, and left the café for the department store.
"By the way, what on earth did people see on VRChat yesterday? There was a total meltdown! You even got suspended for it! Wow! If I got banned over something like that, I don't think I'd ever sleep again from the injustice!"
"…Don't ask."
Who knew I'd be feeling what my viewers felt yesterday, desperately trying to warn someone away…? Before her curiosity could sharpen, I changed the subject at speed.
"So what are you planning to buy at the department store?"
"A coat for fall!"
"Mm, I see."
"And you always say that, but you're going to buy something too, right?"
"Sorry? I'm genuinely not buying anything."
"Really?!"
"Yes."
Did she think I was lying?
"No! Then! What are you planning to wear?! Your place was practically bare of clothes when I helped you move!"
Ah, that's what this was about.
"If I don't go outside, I don't need any. A few pajamas for around the house and I'm set."
So from the very start, we weren't even thinking along the same axis. I finally understood why she'd been so bewildered back then.
"What!"
"…Is that really so shocking?"
"You have to go outside!"
"It's a hassle."
"But when you're out there, seeing everyone so full of life — doesn't that lift your mood?!"
"It drains mine."
"Then! What about seeing little kids walking hand in hand with their parents?!"
"That drains mine too."
"Er — okay, then! Watching the sunset paint the sky as the sun goes down — doesn't that feel, like, poetic? Doesn't it make you happy?!"
"A sunset is simply the result of light scattering, determined by the sun's angle and atmospheric conditions. Is a capacity for sentiment actually required to look at it?"
"…You were a science kid?"
"Yes."
"Sorry… I didn't understand a single word of that, so I can't sympathize…"
For the record, I'm not sure I can sympathize with someone apologizing for their inability to sympathize, either.