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# Chapter 1
Among the countless days that pass by as though they are nothing special, there are sometimes days when so much of one’s
life is turned upside down.
For me, that day came seven years ago. On a winter day when I was nineteen.
“Jaehyun, it’s been a long time. I’m sorry I haven’t been able to come often. I always want to visit, but as I get
older, it becomes harder to do so.”
I raised my head.
Inside the memorial hall, several photographs and a few script books had been neatly placed beside the pristine white
urn containing the ashes.
The boy in the photograph was smiling at the camera with a face exactly like mine when I was young.
Other than the movie DVD package I had placed there last year, nothing about the arrangement had changed. In other
words, I was the only one who had come to pay respects again this year.
With a bitter feeling in my heart, I brushed away the thin layer of dust that had settled on top of the urn.
“…Looks like Father didn’t come again this year either. You must be lonely.”
Click!
After dusting it off, I skillfully held up a lighter and lit the incense. Along with its acrid scent, pale smoke rose
into the air and obscured my view.
My twin younger brother, Hyun Jaehyun, had been an actor.
Although Hyun Jaehyun and I had been born identical twins, we hadn’t been able to spend much time together. The year we
turned five, our parents divorced, and Hyun Jaehyun went with our father.
I went with our mother and lived a life completely opposite to Hyun Jaehyun’s.
From a young age, Hyun Jaehyun dreamed of becoming an actor and eventually became a child actor. Compared to him, I
simply continued living an ordinary life like everyone else.
However…
“I still wonder about it even now. I wish you had at least left behind a final word. No, even if you had left behind the
smallest clue, how much easier would it have been?”
Hyun Jaehyun ended his own life when he was nineteen, just before becoming an adult.
‘If you were wronged, you could have told me you were wronged. If you were suffering, you could have told me you were
suffering. If you had just left behind a single word, would something have changed? That’s what family is for.’
Even now, seven years later, at the age of twenty-six, I could remember that day as clearly as if it had happened
yesterday.
The day I happened to be in that place, at that time, alone, and engraved the final moments of my younger brother into
my own eyes.
During his nine years as a child actor, Hyun Jaehyun had spent six years as an unknown actor. It was only in his ninth
year that he began gaining public recognition.
Yet suddenly, Hyun Jaehyun became nothing more than a cold urn of ashes and was placed here.
From that day onward, my own life also changed drastically.
And today was Hyun Jaehyun’s death anniversary.
‘Even the police didn’t know why he ended his life without leaving behind a single note. And in that situation, there
was no way for someone like me to find out anything either.’
I let out a troubled sigh before clearing away the memorial table. Other people apparently placed food or belongings
that the deceased had loved during their lifetime, but I didn’t even know what Jaehyun liked, so I had to put snacks on
the table that children would probably enjoy.
He didn’t have any friends his own age either. Even though he had worked as an actor since childhood, not a single one
of his fellow actors had come to pay their respects.
Even his biological father, who had raised Jaehyun, had disappeared without a trace after the funeral. His mother, who
had always been physically frail, gradually deteriorated after losing Jaehyun and passed away two years later.
Our family, which had been precarious from the very beginning, was destroyed like that.
‘If you hadn’t died, Mother wouldn’t have been consumed by grief and passed away either. And perhaps I… wouldn’t be
living like this now.’
Every year, whenever I stood in this place, questions rose from the depths of my throat.
Why on earth had this kid had to die at such a young age?
Whenever those questions came to mind, I would clear away the memorial table and leave, trying to shake off the
complicated feelings weighing on me.
So it was time for me to leave this year as well.
“I’ll be going now. See you next year.”
I gave the urn a short bow before turning around.
A man was standing at the entrance of the memorial hall. He wore a black mask over his face and had pulled a
wide-brimmed cap deeply over his head. Holding a bouquet of white flowers, he was staring at me.
The man remained standing at the entrance without moving. A strange chill ran down my spine, so I awkwardly spoke.
“…Excuse me, I’m leaving now, so please come in.”
The man still didn’t move.
His face was hidden, and he simply stood there like a ghost, staring blankly at me. At this point, I could feel the
hairs on my body standing on end.
I merely lowered my head slightly and took a step to pass him.
Grab!
“Hyun… Hyun Jaehyun, the actor? You were alive? No, how are you alive?”
“What?”
“The… that can’t be… How…”
Crash!
The bouquet fell to the floor and scattered.
The man grabbed my forearm tightly, stammering and trembling.
“Hyun Jaehyun was definitely dead…!”
“…Did you come here to pay your respects to Jaehyun?”
“What are you talking about?”
Only then did I roughly understand the situation.
Yes, something like this had happened occasionally around the time of the funeral.
Some people who had only known Hyun Jaehyun had seen me standing there as one of the bereaved family members and had
mistaken me for his ghost, becoming terrified.
That was how much Hyun Jaehyun and I resembled each other. Even now, at twenty-six, our appearances hadn’t changed very
much.
I finally managed to pull my arm free from his powerful grip and spoke.
“I’m not Jaehyun. I’m his older brother. We’re twins, so that’s why. We look a lot alike, don’t we?”
“…Tw, twins?”
---
The man poured the juice I had given him into a paper cup. His hands were trembling so badly that I watched carefully to
make sure he didn’t spill it before asking.
“What kind of relationship did you have with Jaehyun? It seems like this is your first time coming to pay your respects…
As far as I remember, I don’t think you visited even before he was cremated.”
“Ah… that…”
His worn-out voice sounded muffled. He seemed to be around middle age. Since he frequently slurred his pronunciation and
stammered, I had to listen carefully to understand him.
It seemed extremely difficult for him to speak, and he squeezed the words out with great effort.
“I… I was a director…”
“A director?”
“A film director…”
“Oh, then you’re the director of one of the movies Jaehyun appeared in? Thank you so much for coming. This is my
business card. Please take it.”
I took out a business card from my wallet and handed it to him.
The moment he saw it, the man pushed the bouquet he had gathered back toward me and repeatedly refused.
“I’m sorry, but I don’t work on films anymore…”
“That’s not why I’m giving it to you. There’s something I’d personally like to ask you. Then at least take my contact
information. You’re the first person to come here to pay your respects since Jaehyun’s funeral, Director.”
“I’m sorry.”
After his repeated refusals, I awkwardly nodded.
Most of the people from the entertainment industry who had attended the funeral had reacted similarly to this director.
‘Why is he so reluctant to talk?’
Was it because of the unfortunate way Jaehyun had died?
Because everyone had thoroughly avoided the subject, there was no way for me to know the real reason.
But now that ten years had passed, perhaps he would be able to answer me.
“My name is Hyun Woohyun. May I ask your name, Director?”
“Yes, yes… I see. Th, then I’ll be going.”
“I’ll even buy you a meal, so could you please talk with me a little longer? Please?”
He acted as though he hadn’t heard me at all and staggered away.
‘What the hell?’
He was refusing to reveal anything about himself to an almost pathological degree.
I watched his back as he fled the memorial hall with a stiff expression, then quickly moved.
‘I don’t think I can let that man get away.’
It was a kind of certainty.
That man knew something about my brother’s death.
I was certain that if I let him go now, I would never find a way to resolve my questions for the rest of my life.
I slung my bag over my shoulder and followed him.
Before long, he started running.
Tap tap tap!
‘No, just what is he so afraid of that he’s even running?’
It was early dawn, and the wide road was completely empty.
He ran awkwardly across the crosswalk as if he were being chased by a murderer.
“Huff, huff… I’m just asking you to talk to me! Director!”
“N-no! I don’t want to! I’m sorry, but I don’t!”
Fortunately, he was slow and I was fast.
Grab!
After I caught him, he turned around irritably.
His face was still hidden.
“Hoo… No, seriously, what is wrong with you? You even bought flowers. Is it really that difficult to talk to me for just
a few minutes?”
“L-let go of me! Let go! Shit, I’m going to die… I’m going to fucking die… Just like him, shit…”
I had expected something like this, but he was in an even worse mental state than I had anticipated.
He desperately swung his right arm, which I was holding, trying to break free.
I asked him desperately.
“What are you talking about? Who are you going to die like? Are you talking about my brother?”
“Yes, that’s right! When I look at your face, it’s like that kid crawled up from hell to come get me!”
“…You’re completely insane.”
He continued rambling incomprehensible words before suddenly screaming and swinging his fist at me.
Thud!
I caught the fist that had struck my right shoulder and spoke.
“…Did you just hit me? I think it would be better for you to come with me to the police station and have a long
conversation.”
His movements suddenly stopped.
His complexion turned pale as he stared at me with his jaw hanging open.
Perhaps my threat to call the police had worked.
I rubbed my aching shoulder and took out my phone.
“…Behind you.”
“What?”
“Behind… Look behind you.”
I turned around at his words.
We had been struggling on the crosswalk of the empty road, but both of us froze at the same time.
On a quiet road beside a secluded park, a rare cargo truck was…
“What…”
It was charging toward us at a speed more suited to a highway.
The vehicle had come right up to us, yet it showed no sign of stopping.
Thump!
Perhaps the strength had left his legs, because he collapsed onto the ground.
I hurriedly grabbed him and shouted.
“R-run!”
“Uh… uh…”
“If we stay here, we’ll die! Huh? Sir! If you don’t want to die, get up right now!”
At that moment, I saw it.
A faint connection between the vehicle, which had turned black and white, and me.
They were connected by a wavering thread.
The flow of the red thread grew taut and rapidly shortened…
Boom!
The world violently flipped upside down.
---
“Gasp.”
The cargo truck hit me.
It hit me.
The confused memory of the accident creaked and groaned.
My vision was blurry.
I crouched down, clutching my head with both hands.
‘Wait, I crouched down?’
Suddenly, I slowly opened my eyes.
I wasn’t flying through the sky.
I wasn’t rolling across the ground.
I wasn’t trapped underneath the truck.
This wasn’t heaven or hell.
There were simply camera lenses and countless people staring at me.
Under several cameras and unbelievably bright lights, I stood there in a daze.
“Cut! Let’s stop filming for a moment. What’s wrong, Jaehyun? Are you hurt?”
“…Jaehyun?”
They were calling me ‘Jaehyun.’
I had collapsed onto the floor and desperately ran my hands through my hair in confusion.
No, I had just been hit by a car, and my name wasn’t even Jaehyun in the first place.
This wasn’t a hospital either.
Then where the hell was I?
“Was that just a crazy dream…?”
“Whoa, whoa! He’s going down!”
Amid the crowd, I willingly let myself lose consciousness.