The Contest (9)

A cold sweat beaded along my skin.

Anyone could tell the whole thing reeked of nothing but bad omens.

Just calm down… calm down.

It wasn't as if Seoa and Nari had gone out drinking just the two of them. Judging by the atmosphere, it looked like a whole group had headed out for drinks. They'd probably just run into each other by chance—the kind of popular kids' drinking party someone like me would never get invited to.

Seoa had always gotten along well with the upperclassmen, so a combination like this probably wasn't anything particularly special. I was just attaching meaning to it with weird, unnecessary imaginings.

For the moment, I was exchanging messages with Nari over social media, trying to stay composed. When she asked if I was angry, I hesitated over how to answer—and right in the middle of that hesitation, my phone rang.

The second I picked up, I heard Nari's voice, a little nasal. She seemed to be apologizing with a touch of coyness. And if she was putting on a voice like that, she was probably a bit drunk.

After drinking that much yesterday, she was already at it again.

Anyway… I was still plenty angry, but it settled a little. It was hard to keep lashing out at someone who was apologizing.

"We've got the contest coming up soon. So I'm a little… And after what happened with noona yesterday, too. I just keep wondering what the hell this whole group thing is supposed to be."

"A group thing? Unnie didn't come either?"

"Yeah…"

"Ah… Should I head over now?"

"Don't bother. I'll handle it on my own today."

"Sorry. Oh! And she's here too, by the way. Seoa."

Honestly, I'd been about to hang up just to show I was in a bad mood. But the moment Nari brought up Seoa, my ears pricked up and I had no choice but to listen.

Of course I was curious. What on earth was going on over there?

"Did something happen?"

"Nooo—why? You think something's going to happen?"

"It's not really that, it's just…"

After that, a racket of noise flooded through from Nari's end of the line, and then the call cut off. She'd probably gotten chewed out for being on the phone at a drinking party.

…It was bothering me a little.

So I tried calling noona as well. She hadn't posted anything on social media, so I had no idea where she was or what she was doing. More than being angry that she hadn't shown up to the club, I was worried whether she was all right.

When I got through… noona answered in a voice that sounded completely half-dead.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I must've drunk too much yesterday. The hangover… my condition's really bad."

Judging by that voice, it didn't sound like a lie. It was completely hoarse, like she'd genuinely just woken up. And noona wasn't the type to lie about something like that anyway.

It felt wrong to give someone who was sick a hard time, so I just told her to rest up and hung up.

So everyone had their reasons, in the end. Nothing I could do about it.

I stayed alone in the club room for a while, just sitting with my thoughts. It was less that I was thinking about anything specific and more like meditation. It wasn't as if there was anything I could accomplish here by myself. I was the one who worked from home; this place was more for exchanging ideas and checking on development progress.

I'd just sit for a bit, steady my breathing, and head home soon.

I was resting like that when something kept churning through my head. I tried desperately not to care, not to think about anything at all. And still the thought kept surfacing.

Nari and Seoa being together made me uneasy. Seoa had quieted down a little lately, but there was no telling when or how she might suddenly do something again. And ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠come to think of it… Seoa was the kind of person who'd gone and said something to Sebin noona, too.

Which meant that if she got the chance, Seoa would absolutely try to drive a wedge with Nari as well.

And what worried me even more was that Nari wasn't the type to hide things either—she'd go head-to-head. If Seoa suddenly started that kind of stirring, the two of them might end up in a fight.

Maybe I really should go check. But on what grounds was I supposed to show up there?

I hadn't been invited… and I couldn't exactly walk in and say I'd come because I was worried about Nari.

Haa… my head hurt.

W-well, maybe I could at least hang around nearby and nose about a little.

I knew it was a somewhat underhanded thing to do, but underhanded was all I was in a position to manage, so that was the choice I had ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠to make. I left the club room and started walking—only to realize, belatedly, that I didn't even know which bar they were at, so even that underhanded plan was a nonstarter.

My bold stride toward the main gate lost its destination and wandered. I just loitered by the entrance… then mustered the energy for one last look around the bar strip.

"Hey… should I try hitting on that first-year, Seoa?"

"Bullshit. You liked Nari."

"Yeah, but she's too much work. She's ridiculously pretty, sure… but she acts like she knows it?"

"And you think you can land Seoa? I heard even Woo-bin hyung got shot down by her."

"For real? Damn, her standards are sky high…"

I could overhear a group of guys talking outside a shop. They were standing in a circle smoking, trading that kind of conversation.

From the names they were dropping, they seemed to be people from our department. Maybe wherever they went back into was the place I'd been looking for, so I kept eavesdropping and loitering nearby.

"Man… is there any way? I really want to meet her once."

"Yeah, fair. She's pretty hot, right?"

"She's a first-year, so if you get her drunk and sweet-talk her, she might go for it."

"You psycho. You're seriously obsessed with women."

"Says the guy who just admitted she turns him on?"

Hey, hey… what the hell kind of conversation was that? These vulgar bastards.

It wasn't the kind of talk you could just sit there and calmly overhear. It was thoroughly unpleasant. Honestly, I'd seen groups of guys like this since high school—ones who casually spouted this kind of garbage even when the target wasn't Seoa.

Even with age, people like that never changed.

No matter how badly things had ended between Seoa and me… hearing this still didn't sit right. There was ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠nothing pleasant about someone I'd spent years with—someone I'd loved—being tossed around so casually as material for sexual harassment in other men's mouths. Still, she and I weren't that kind of close anymore. I didn't have the motive or the justification to step in. And honestly… even if we'd still been friends, I wasn't sure I would have had the courage to speak up. I couldn't say for certain. I was a coward by nature.

I'd just pretend I hadn't heard.

They flicked their cigarettes carelessly onto the ground and went back inside. I followed after them.

I didn't plan on going all the way in—just a quick peek through the door from outside.

But right at that moment, the shop door swung open from the inside, and people from our department came out.

"Huh… isn't that Kwon Minjae?"

"Seoa… Minjae's here?"

Of all people, Seoa and her friends were the first ones through that door, and we ended up in the most awkward encounter possible. Seoa's friends stared at me with startled rabbit eyes as they said it. And Seoa was no different.

Honestly, I considered just turning around and running right then and there.

"Who's that? Someone you know?"

Someone who seemed to be herding the whole group looked at me and started asking the people around him.

Seoa hesitated, then opened her mouth to speak.

"He's… from our department, and my childho—"

But before Seoa could finish, Nari cut across her.

"I called him. You people should look after your own underclassmen a little. You don't even know your juniors' faces…"

"Ah… hello."

Nari had been the last one out of the shop, but before I knew it she was at my side, introducing me to everyone. Which meant I ended up fumbling through a greeting of my own.

And somehow, just like that, I got folded into the group on the way to the second round. I'd wondered if that was even okay, but once Nari said she was bringing me along, everyone just went along with it.

"What are you doing here?"

"…I, uh, was just bored on my way past."

"Why? Were you worried, maybe?"

"A… little?"

At the second bar, I naturally ended up sitting next to Nari, trading that kind of conversation. Looking at her energy level, she was definitely drunk. And the smell of alcohol drifted faintly to my nose.

"Nari, who's the guy next to you?"

"I already said—he's our department's junior? Don't ignore him. He may not look like much, but he's way better at coding than any of you."

"Oh! Is that the one? The kid doing the contest with you this time?"

"Yep! Our developer! I'm just planning to freeload off him this round."

Nari was talking me up to the other upperclassmen. She usually treated me so roughly… but in front of other people she seemed to look out for me, and that made me quietly happy. Grateful, even.

But while she was doing that, I kept feeling an unidentified gaze boring into me from somewhere, so I turned my head slightly to check.

And sure enough—Seoa was still staring at me. With a somehow wistful expression.

Only then did I realize just how uncomfortable this seat was for me. It wasn't a perfect analogy, but if I stretched it a little…

It was basically like sitting at a table where your ex-girlfriend and your current almost-girlfriend were drinking together.

This was not a place I could sit around looking calm!!

And as I thought that, something about myself surprised me a little.

I'd come to this table… because I was worried about Nari. Seoa was here too, but I'd walked all the way here thinking only of Nari.

It was strange.

The fact that what had moved my feet wasn't Seoa anymore, but Nari… was really strange.

Seoa kept staring at me for a long while. Every time I turned my head, our eyes met, so I had to wonder if she was still looking even now.

And clustered around Seoa, when I glanced over, were those same guys I'd run into outside earlier.

The ones who'd been openly snickering among themselves and sexually harassing her with their talk.

They kept pouring her a lot of drinks, and Seoa seemed to look a little uncomfortable about it.

It stuck in my eye. Actually watching that scene… it was hard to just ignore and move on.

If I hadn't known those guys' intentions, maybe I could have let it slide. But I'd heard them myself. I knew exactly what kind of eyes they were looking at Seoa with.

Talking that kind of garbage among themselves earlier was one thing—but seeing them actually surround her like this, those words didn't feel like a joke anymore. It felt like they might actually try something.

"Minjae, what are you thinking about? You're suddenly spacing out."

"Ah… maybe it's from drinking too much yesterday. My head's a little fuzzy."

"Yeah, you did drink a lot yesterday. Anyway, scoot over a bit. I'm going to the bathroom."

"Ah, okay."

Nari headed off to the restroom.

Was this… my chance? Should I go help Seoa? Nari was gone for the moment—if I just went over to her briefly… maybe I could get her out of that seat.

I was going crazy.

I had no idea what the right thing to do was.

Whether I should do what was morally right, or what made sense given my personal circumstances.

Was ignoring ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠this the right thing? Because my connection with Seoa had been severed, was I supposed to know what was happening to her and still look the other way to the very end? Was I really allowed to act like this had nothing to do with me?

Or, having pushed her away… was I supposed to turn around now and help her, as if I were leaving her some kind of opening?

And after telling Nari so confidently that things with Seoa were over… was I even allowed to do something like that?

If I'd truly steeled my heart… was I supposed to close my eyes even in a situation like this and cut it out of myself?

I was genuinely lost. No matter what I did… it didn't feel like there would be any purely good outcome. Choosing the option with the least risk was probably the best I could do.

I had to decide quickly. Nari would be back any second. If I was going to help Seoa at all… I had to act right now.