A Fleeting Hope
The moment I stepped through the front door, the clatter of dishes drifted from the kitchen. Dad called out to me in a booming voice.
“A-yeong~ You’re a little late, huh?”
“I went for a run at the park near the house.”
“That so? How was your first day on the job?”
“Just… busier than I expected.”
The conversation with Dad flowed naturally. My emotions had definitely settled.
“Whew~ Look at all that sweat. Go wash up quick and come eat.”
“Ah… okay.”
I answered and headed into my room to grab a change of underwear.
“Ugh… so this is women’s clothing? Why’s it so tiny?”
Yesterday and this morning my head had been such a mess that I’d just thrown on whatever was in front of me. I hadn’t even had the bandwidth to think about women’s clothes.
“For now… I’ll just match the colors roughly and grab something.”
I scooped up whatever underwear caught my eye, along with an oversized T-shirt and a pair of shorts.
Still fully dressed, I stepped into the bathroom. A quick deep breath steadied my nerves.
Yesterday I’d been so overwhelmed by the excitement that I’d done every stupid thing imaginable. Today I had to face this body as calmly as possible.
“Okay. I already saw everything yesterday. No big deal…”
I set the clean clothes in the corner and peeled off my sweat-soaked layers one by one. Once the thick sweatshirt and track pants were gone, I was left standing there in nothing but underwear.
“Wow… I really just threw on whatever and walked out, didn’t I?”
I stared at my reflection in the mirror as if hypnotized. Not knowing how women’s underwear was supposed to work, I’d simply grabbed whatever looked the most comfortable.
“Look at the colors top and bottom…”
The top and bottom were completely opposite colors. Different styles, too—both pieces clinging to my body, soaked through with sweat.
Then I noticed it… the panties were wet with a texture that wasn’t just sweat. A flicker of the earlier excitement rose again.
“Stop…! Don’t think about that…”
I shook my head hard, banishing the thought. I stuffed the underwear into the laundry basket in a hurry and stepped into the shower stall without looking at the mirror again.
I turned the cold water on full blast, cooling my overheated body.
Shhhhh—
The icy stream soaked my hair and cascaded down my skin. Following the path of the water, both body and mind slowly cooled.
“Good. I can still control this just fine.”
I washed myself quickly. Lingering too long with my hands would only risk the same kind of arousal as yesterday.
I hummed a military cadence for no real reason, dredging up memories of my army days to keep other thoughts from surfacing.
“Man, the old days… kinda nice to remember.”
They weren’t exactly fond memories, but they were excellent at wiping out stray thoughts.
“Five minutes left for showers~”
I even mimicked a drill instructor’s bark.
“Quick showers are nice, too.”
Finished, I stood in front of the mirror again. I took a deep breath in and out, then examined the underwear I’d brought.
“Is this a blessing or what?”
They didn’t look nearly as complicated as I’d feared. Given that the original Park A-yeong had always loved sports, she seemed to prefer practical underwear over anything particularly feminine.
I grunted and wriggled into them. They hugged my body tighter than expected.
“Ugh… why is this so snug?”
Twisting this way and that, I finally got them on. Once dressed, I stood still and studied myself in the mirror.
“Really… healthy-looking.”
A body without an ounce of spare fat and firm, defined abs caught my eye. I remembered how, even when I was out of breath running in the park earlier, my legs had just kept driving forward.
“Healthier than I used to be.”
Naturally, the image of my old male self surfaced—the protruding belly, the double chin that folded whenever I looked in a mirror. Waking up in this body almost felt like a stroke of luck.
“Just be careful. That’s all. Careful.”
I pulled on the rest of the clothes I’d brought. Even in the oversized T-shirt, my chest still pushed out in a clear curve.
“Just how big are these things, anyway…”
Suddenly I remembered that lingerie shops could measure your size. Maybe I should stop by one sometime.
“I could go with Hui-yeong.”
I left the bathroom, toweling my hair as I headed for the kitchen. Dad took one look at me and let out a long sigh.
“Wash properly, will you? What kind of girl finishes a shower in five or ten minutes?”
“So what? I’m clean enough.”
“And dry your hair right. Other girls are so demure, but you…”
“I was on the athletic team, so it’s fine.”
I answered with the kind of line the original Park A-yeong would have used and sat down at the table. A few simple side dishes and a pot of stew were laid out modestly.
Real home cooking… it had been so long.
Hiding the tremor in my chest, I started eating dinner.
“More importantly, A-yeong.”
“Mmmph…?”
“Swallow first, then talk. Anyway, the part-time job was okay, right?”
The mention of the job brought the café back into my mind.
“About Deok-hun—he looks a bit rough, but he’s a good guy. He’s got a solid work ethic, doesn’t he?”
Dad launched into talk about Choi Deok-hun.
“He might seem off at first, but once you work with him it’s different, right?”
I hurriedly swallowed what was in my mouth and answered.
Gulp—
“…Ha. Well, he works hard enough…”
I couldn’t tell the full truth and watch Dad get hurt. As long as I handled things carefully, nothing would go wrong.
“Just… he acts a little too friendly, that’s all…”
“He’s just happy to see you, that’s all~”
Dad clapped me lightly on the shoulder and stood up.
“You know the cleanup’s on you, right? Dad’s gonna go rest a bit.”
“Mm!”
I finished the rest of my rice while thinking about what lay ahead. Today my body had heated up again without fail, but I had managed to keep my senses and desires under control.
“Yeah. I can do this.”
The confidence that had faded earlier swelled back up, and I found myself thinking I could keep working at the café after all.
After the meal I returned to my room. With a much calmer mind, I looked around.
On a chest of drawers in one corner stood various trophies—achievements from her days as a swimmer, scattered everywhere.
“She really was something.”
I sat at the desk and slowly scanned the bookshelf. It was packed with nothing but reference books. Even after quitting sports, she must have studied like crazy for the college entrance exam. My old self felt shabby by comparison.
“This is where I really need to start looking carefully…”
I stood in front of the wardrobe. Right now, this might be the most important place for me.
“Okay, I can’t just live in tracksuits and workout gear forever.”
Curious about what kind of feminine clothes might be waiting, I opened the doors.
“Pants, pants, workout clothes, tracksuits, hooded zip-ups… pretty much the same as the men’s clothes I used to wear.”
I pulled out a pair of jeans and held them against my body. Even a quick comparison of the legs told me they wouldn’t go on easily.
“Women actually manage to wear these things?”
I tossed the jeans back in. The thought that I wouldn’t have to prepare much in the way of everyday clothes brought a sigh of relief.
Next I opened another drawer. The moment it slid open, I found exactly what I’d been looking for.
“Underwear… I’ve got to get used to this.”
I’d spent my whole life in boxer briefs. Wearing women’s underwear had to become as natural as breathing. Only then would little things stop getting me so worked up.
“Well, this one, and this one… nothing too sexy, huh?”
Fortunately, the previous Park A-yeong seemed to have stuck to comfortable styles.
“Even the bras… they all look like short tank tops.”
No matter where I looked, there were no complicated pieces. Everything was plain and practical, like gear made for athletes.
“Basically… putting them on is pretty much the same as men’s clothes.”
Nothing that required special practice. I let out a breath of relief.
“Whew… I was worried she might have worn weird stuff every day. Glad that’s not the case.”
I put everything back in order, then flopped onto the bed. The dizzying day replayed itself.
“Today wasn’t easy…”
Ever since the possession, I hadn’t had enough time to sort out my situation or my thoughts. Collapsing at the pool and waking up in this body meant everything had just kept rolling forward before I could even catch my breath.
“Hui-yeong… I never even answered her message.”
I thought about texting her back, but my head was too full. What was I supposed to say… how had I even talked to Hui-yeong before…
“I remember the scenes clearly enough… but I’ll just do it tomorrow.”
I pushed thoughts of Hui-yeong aside. A more important person was still waiting.
“Lim Se-yeong…”
The first time I saw him, he’d clearly been a delicate, fragile friend—someone I needed to protect rather than someone who would protect me. But the feelings that rose as I grew more in sync with this body were different.
“He seems so warm…”
My thoughts naturally turned inward—to the man I used to be, and to who I was now. Everything grew more complicated by the second.
“Well… whatever else, doing it with a guy…”
Maybe it would actually be okay…?
“Ugh… what am I thinking!”
It was probably because I’d jerked off so hard right after the possession. My mind had gotten way too open.
“Even so…”
Even if I developed an open mind…
“I still need to be careful around Choi Deok-hun.”
The way he looked at me. That smile that somehow felt off. And more than anything…
“When I met Lim Se-yeong… something was definitely weird.”
Anyone could see he hated Se-yeong. Especially the way he tried to pull me away from him.
Remembering that made everything sharper. Choi Deok-hun was definitely the netorare guy. But that didn’t mean I could just avoid him. Today I’d walked a fine line, yet I’d still managed to keep my desires in check.
“So what if I get a little turned on? I can just go for another run.”
Still, a corner of my heart felt uneasy. At the end, the way I’d almost turned Se-yeong down…
“I just… I just… didn’t want him to feel bad if I got too busy because of me…”
Yeah. That was all it was. Nothing more to it…
“When your head’s a mess, just run until it clears.”
The memory of holding myself back at the end filled me with fresh courage. With the resolve that I could handle tomorrow just fine, I drifted off to sleep.