Chapter 48: Kwon Min-su
Chapter 48: Kwon Min-su
Side Story 2. Kwon Min-su
The first time I saw a zombie was at that shitty company outing.
It was some tiny-ass company, but apparently management wanted to copy everything the bigger companies did, so they held an outing every year. And that was the day the whole world went to shit.
That day, one of the women on my team kept screeching at me, so I was off slacking on my own.
I was just about to head back when zombies showed up on the sports field and started attacking the other employees.
So I bolted right away. As if I'd go in there like some lunatic.
Honestly, the funny thing was that at first, I thought it would be great.
I got into the whole fantasy novel thing back in high school, and even in the army I devoured anything I could get my hands on, so when this apocalypse situation hit, part of me was almost glad.
I had plenty of secondhand experience, and my life was already a dead-end tech tree anyway. If the world went to shit too, maybe things would get a little better, right?
And honestly, I figured I was the main character...
At times like that, sizing up the situation early was what mattered, right?
I booked it straight to a convenience store to secure food first.
Ah, but the second I hit the road, cars were smashing into each other everywhere, just like in GTATO.
What, you've never heard of that masterpiece? Doesn't matter. It's a game.
Anyway, I figured one wrong move and I'd get run over, so I watched for an opening and barely made it into the convenience store.
I checked on the employee lying on the floor, then figured I'd stuff whatever looked edible into a convenience-store bag and find somewhere to hole up.
But you gotta actually have somewhere to hole up.
People were running like crazy, and at some point, the zombies lying on the ground started getting up again.
So I shoved some middle-aged guy running next to me and tossed him out as zombie chow, then spotted some kind of street-vendor tarp and ducked inside to hide. That's how I survived.
See? The opening is everything. Freeze up and you're dead before the game even starts.
#
"Fuuuck..."
God-tier Status Window, my ass. More like a fucking shit-tier Status Window.
That was when I first realized something was off.
In the web novels I'd read, the protagonist would usually shout, 'God-tier Status Window!' before discovering some ridiculously broken ability.
Except this idiot right here didn't get a combat ability. I got stuck with some lame support ability you'd normally pick up later as a secondary skill.
* Creation: Third Eye
* Range Increase
* Available Points: 0
When I tried it out, some kind of invisible eyeball popped out. Basically, it was just a silent drone.
My ability was a fucking drone. Tell me that wouldn't piss you off.
I wasn't the main character. I was an extra.
Ha... My original plan was to wait for the Status Window, snag some early achievements, and play the overpowered protagonist for a while.
You know the kind—things like 'First Person to Kill a Zombie' and all that.
Then I'd collect the achievement rewards and get a huge head start.
But have you bastards ever watched someone get torn apart and eaten right in front of you?
No lie, it's scary as fuck.
That shitty Status Window didn't even have levels. How the fuck was I supposed to take on zombies bare-handed?
The only things I'd ever killed were ants, mosquitoes, dragonflies—stuff like that.
Anyway, a novel's just a novel, and I figured if I went out like this I'd get a game over right away, so I just stayed quietly hidden.
I was determined to put the hiding skills I'd honed during a full term of military service to use.
Whenever the cooldown ended, I sent the eyeball out again to check the area. The people gradually disappeared.
Ugh, there was this woman who'd kicked off her heels and was running for her life, but a zombie chased her down, flattened her, and started eating her ass first.
Fuck... I didn't mean eating her out. I meant actually eating her.
#
Was it two days?
By then, everything had gone quiet, like the whole world was dead.
The people had all fled, and the zombies had chased after them. Even the noise that had been coming from every direction was gone.
But then some bastards came creeping over, hiding behind cars like ninjas.
At first I tensed up, thinking they were zombies, but I recognized the guy.
"Min-su, why are you holed up in there? Come on out."
Ah, this muscle-bound pig.
Had the guy finally finished replacing his brain with muscle?
Why the hell did he think I'd crawled in here? Obviously, I was hiding from the zombies.
This gorilla-looking bastard was Manager Kim, from my company.
He worked in another department, so I didn't know him well. But just looking at him, you had to wonder why the hell a guy like that was selling table-tennis equipment.
He looked strong as fuck. He was tall, sure, but his sheer bulk was on another level.
First time I saw him, I honestly thought he was an athlete.
My ability was already screwed, so I figured it'd be perfect to latch onto him, and I called out as he was passing by.
"Min-su, are you alone?"
And there he was, showing off by walking around with a woman.
Looked like he'd lucked out and picked one up somewhere. She seemed a little older, but her face was decent and she had a fat ass. She looked worth a fuck.
But her face was kind of familiar, like I'd seen her somewhere before? Eh, whatever.
Anyway, that's not the point. Fuck, that's how I was supposed to be living.
When the apocalypse hits, you're supposed to toss a woman a can of food, tell her to spread her legs, then fuck her and dump her when you get bored...
No one's left to arrest you, right?
If only I'd gotten a decent ability, I could've flattened even that muscle pig. What a waste.
But I wondered what Manager Kim's ability was.
That bastard looked like the type who could knock out one or two zombies without any ability at all.
So I ran my mouth to score some food and tried to hitch a free ride with him, but the bitch behind him clearly hated the idea.
In the end, he said I couldn't join them, so I decided to stick an eyeball on him to test out my ability while I was at it.
Wow, this crazy bastard.
He just up and shattered a zombie's skull.
He said it was some kind of strength-enhancing ability, but a guy who was already a monster turned into a real monster.
Watching him, it was not just his strength—the guy seemed fearless too. Then again, you had to understand something before you could fear it. What would an old geezer like him know?
The eyeball didn't last long, so all I saw was them looting the convenience store. Still, I figured I'd survive if I could stick with that guy.
But I couldn't find an opening.
He seemed a little slow, so I buttered him up and got him to hand over an entire convenience store's worth of supplies, but the bitch beside him kept blocking me at every turn.
She was probably off spouting shit like, 'Tae-sik, stop giving that guy stuff. He was eyeing me up, okay?'
#
"Hey, kid. Did you clear this place out?"
"Ah, yes. I took care of all the zombies."
Ha... Fuck my life.
Not a single chick ever just drops into my lap.
I went to sleep, and when I woke up, some pig-looking bastard had shown up with a lanky string bean, holding a knife and threatening me.
According to them, fellow humans ought to share whatever they had.
They had a knife in my face. What was I supposed to do?
I had to agree, obviously. But the funny thing was, when I asked what their abilities were, the bastards just blabbed everything.
One of them was Blink, and the other was something called a Reverse World or whatever.
So I thought it over. Should I latch onto Manager Kim, or these guys?
But you can't beat a numbers game, right?
So for now, I figured I'd play nice with them, and if an opening came up, I'd either run or backstab them.
But not long after, Manager Kim came to the convenience store, and the woman he had with him was a different one.
So I went downstairs just to get a look at her face. Damn, did this bastard have no conscience?
He had a girl who looked at least ten years younger than him hanging off his arm.
Jealous as fuck, that bastard... But this one hid behind Manager Kim and glared daggers at me too.
She looked closer to my age. What the hell was so great about some middle-aged guy...
That fucking bitch was probably clingy as gum, reeked between the legs, and had an ass covered in pimples.
Ah... why was every woman I met like this? It pissed me the hell off.
What had I ever done wrong for every one of them to narrow their eyes and glare at me?
Even back when I was at the company, that woman on my team was always throwing fits like she was on her period every damn day.
My mood went straight to shit, so I made up my mind. I'd rile up the pig and the anchovy and have them take down that bastard Manager Kim.
I'd teach those shitty bitches a lesson too. The pig and the anchovy were both dumb enough to manipulate, so I figured I'd work them from behind the scenes.
Up until now, the eyeball maintenance time was too short, so I hadn't been able to track where Manager Kim was staying, you know?
The anchovy's ability kept him from getting caught, so I gave him the apartment's rough location and told him to check it out.
When I let slip there were women there, they got all excited and followed along nicely.
The officetel across the way had women too, but when I told them they were all middle-aged, they lost interest.
This time, I told them the girl looked like a college student, and they were ready to raid the place right then and there.
So I told them I had a good plan and to be patient for a bit.
That bastard Manager Kim had probably fucked the woman he was dragging around until he got bored, then swapped her for another one from the apartment, right?
I told them to think of it as getting first dibs before he handed her off.
Oh-ho? The anchovy even found out the door passcode?
That meant free admission. He said he'd staked the place out, then watched Manager Kim leave with a woman that morning.
So I told the pig that meant the place was empty, and we all raided it together.
I said we'd hide and ambush them when they came back. That way, Manager Kim might go berserk and take the pig or the anchovy down with him.
Then, depending on the situation, I'd clean up the mess and just take the women, or if one side crushed the other, I'd latch onto that side instead...
Honestly, I designed the ambush specifically to keep either side from crushing the other. I needed to make sure they actually fought.
Please, just tear each other apart and die.
But then, fuck me, there was another woman in the apartment.
That crazy bastard had been taking turns with two women all by himself.
The girl got startled and tried to run, even threw up a shield and struggled like crazy, but the anchovy popped out from behind and subdued her in one go.
The dumb brute covered both her mouth and nose at the same time. If I'd been just a little slower telling him to stop, she'd definitely have died.
So I had to change the plan in a hurry.
We'd use the woman who'd been in the apartment as a hostage, pretend we were letting everyone leave peacefully, then cut them down outside.
Now that I'd seen how things stood, I realized Manager Kim might die before he could even react if we ambushed him inside.
Yeah, there was one more girl with him, but what could she do? She was just a trophy.
"Boss, they know my face, so let me try sweet-talking them into leaving."
This pig was easy to handle if you just sucked up to him a little.
Since I kept calling him "Boss" and kissing his ass, he lapped it up and told me to see what I could do.
So I suggested we deal with them outside. Cleaning up bodies was a pain, and with the anchovy's assassin-type ability, I said it would be over quickly.
To the pig, I said all he had to do was follow when Manager Kim came out and pull a little aggro.
I reassured him that Manager Kim was just a big, easy pushover and that he'd have no trouble handling him.
"Min-su, what are you going to do, then? Planning to sit back while your bosses do all the work?"
"Not at all, Boss. I'm just a weakling, you know that..."
That was how I talked them into it, though at first they kept asking what I'd be doing while they worked.
Motherfuckers can't stand seeing someone else take it easy.
I said since I was the weakest, I'd keep watch over the women and take care of all the other annoying grunt work too.
They were staring at me like I was dirt and told me to be grateful, that I'd be dead without them.
It pissed me off, so I decided that if Manager Kim softened them up enough before going down, I'd swoop in for the last hit.
Granted, I'd already been thinking along those lines anyway.
Even if that muscle-bound idiot only landed a few hits before he went down, both bastards were guaranteed to be half-dead.
If they all died outright, there was nothing I could do... The plan might've looked a little sloppy, but this was that thing, you know—mutual destruction.
But while we were talking, this pig bastard must've suddenly gone into heat or something, because he was about to just start plowing the girl right then and there.
Fuck, then I'd have to clean up after this pig bastard later too.
So I stopped him like my life depended on it.
I told him they'd be back around lunchtime, so he should finish the job first and enjoy her afterward. Wouldn't it piss him off if someone interrupted halfway through?
"Boss, anyone can see you have stamina to spare. You should take your time and enjoy her properly. I just think getting interrupted halfway through would ruin it."
Anyone could see he was a pig bastard with a tiny dick, but I sucked up to him until my tongue was raw. Ugh, my life...
I had a hell of a time holding the pig back. Then I gagged the girl and tied up her arms and legs the way I'd seen it done somewhere.
Maybe suppressing his lust made his appetite explode, because the pig suddenly found some ice cream and started shoveling it down.
While the pig and the anchovy snickered together, I struggled to finish tying the girl up. Just as I was about to take a breather, Manager Kim walked right in.
I never got a moment's rest.
I made a mental note to make that broad pay me back with her body later for all this suffering. For now, I had to go sweet-talk Manager Kim again.
My tongue seriously never got a break.
"What do you want."
Like lowering his voice was going to make me shit my pants. He really had to do all the cool-guy posturing himself.
Anyway, something felt off here too.
He didn't seem like he was going to back down easily. Did he actually care about the broad or something?
I dragged things out and kept talking nice, but the bastard wouldn't bite.
The funny part was that once the tattooed pig got a proper look at Manager Kim's build, he got nervous and swallowed hard.
After all that tough-guy posturing, maybe he felt embarrassed, because he suddenly tore off his shirt.
Judging by Manager Kim's reaction, he was completely dismissing him...
Manager Kim must've finally given up, because he asked what we wanted him to do.
So I started rambling about putting down their belongings and whatever else, when something suddenly went fwap—and the whole thing was over.
I honestly had no idea what had happened. Fuck, I wanted to know too.
Fuuuck... My consciousness was fading, and one thought drifted through my head. Maybe that bastard's ability wasn't super strength after all.
It felt like he'd tricked me.
Something came flying in like a bullet, the pig bastard took it and went down instantly, knocked out cold...
I watched from the side, went, 'Huh?' and raised my club—then he vanished right in front of me.
My eyes were closing. My chest hurt like a motherfucker.
Was I going to die like this?
You sly bastard.
You looked dumb as a brick, so I let my guard down, but you turned out to be a cunning son of a bitch.
Anyway, it turned out I was the one whose skull got cracked. Fuuuck...
And even then, this bitch was still glaring at me like she wanted to kill me.
I just hoped those bastards would all die soon too...
Thud