Like a Younger Sister
I pulled out my wallet in front of the hospital's payment counter.
I already knew what was inside. Two ten-thousand-won bills and a few one-thousand-won notes. I didn't know how much the medical bill would be, but I knew this wouldn't be nearly enough.
Still, I pulled it out anyway.
My hands trembled slightly. While the anxious thought of What if it's not enough? flashed through my mind, Bae Si-ah stepped forward and handed over her card first.
The clerk took the card and inserted it into the reader.
I slowly slipped my worn-out wallet back into my pocket.
Ah. So she does have money.
I had guessed as much from looking at her place. An apartment with high ceilings, furnished with nice things.
Then why hadn't she been eating?
It reminded me of Yu Se-ah's darkest days. Whenever I opened her refrigerator, it was completely empty. It wasn't because she didn't have money. She just hadn't wanted to do anything at all.
Bae Si-ah seemed to be in the same state.
Leaving the hospital, I naturally changed direction.
As I picked out ingredients at the grocery store, I mapped out a menu in my head.
Soybean paste stew. Rolled omelet. Dishes that didn't take long, didn't require many ingredients, and were deeply satisfying to eat.
That was the one thing I had learned from cooking while living in poverty: how to make something edible out of next to nothing.
I grabbed some potatoes, tofu, and green onions. I figured Bae Si-ah would have soybean paste at home, but I picked up a small tub of it just in case.
As I placed the items on the conveyor belt, I stole a glance at Bae Si-ah.
She was just standing there, staring blankly.
I took my hands off the cart handle and looked at her.
Noticing my gaze, Bae Si-ah pulled out her card.
I picked up the grocery bag.
I wasn't sure if this was just a natural flow of events or if I was being shameless.
But first, I had to get some food into her.
Bae Si-ah's kitchen was spacious.
The cutting board was large, and the knives were high-quality. But when I opened the cabinets, there was no sign of recent use. The bottoms of the pots were pristine. Not a single drop of oil had been splattered.
It was a kitchen that hadn't seen any cooking in a very long time.
I took out a pot and set some water to boil.
I sliced the potatoes, cubed the tofu, and chopped the green onions diagonally.
My hands moved on autopilot.
My days of prepping ingredients from the crack of dawn came in handy at times like this.
I dissolved the soybean paste in the water and tossed in the ingredients. Soon, the aroma of the simmering stew filled the kitchen.
A rolled omelet had to be rolled slowly over low heat. If you rushed, it would tear.
I remembered getting chewed out by a senior soldier for tearing a rolled omelet. Ever since then, I made sure to strictly stick to low heat.
I sliced the golden-brown rolled omelet and arranged it on a plate.
I scooped rice into two bowls and ladled out the stew.
Carrying the food, I walked out to the dining table.
Bae Si-ah, who had been sitting blankly on the sofa, wandered over to the table.
We sat across from each other, and once she started eating, Bae Si-ah didn't stop moving her spoon.
That was all.
No other words were needed.
The fact that she was eating—that alone was enough.
It had been the same back when I was taking care of Yu Se-ah. Seeing her finish a meal always gave me a sense of accomplishment, like everything was going to be okay.
I guess I was just wired this way.
I had resolved to stop looking after other people, yet here I was again.
Well, whatever.
Once I made sure Bae Si-ah had finished her meal, I cleaned up the dishes and headed home.
The walk back was dark.
Walking through the nighttime alleys, a tangle of thoughts crossed my mind.
I hadn't asked Bae Si-ah why she had ended up like that. Even if I did, she didn't seem to be in any state to answer.
Yu Se-ah had been the same. It was only after a long time had passed that she began to open up, bit by bit.
Until then, I had simply stayed by her side.
It was no different now.
I didn't know if she would show up to school tomorrow, but...
At least I had gotten some food into her today.
I opened the iron door of my semi-basement and stepped inside.
Unlike Bae Si-ah's apartment, the pungent smell of mold immediately assaulted my nose.
The next morning.
When I walked into the classroom, Bae Si-ah's seat was empty.
Yeah, I suppose today would be too much for her.
I sat down in my seat and stared out the window.
It was still early.
Ms. Park Ji-su, our homeroom teacher, walked in just before morning roll call.
She was holding a bundle of paper slips in her hand.
"Oh, um, hello, everyone. I was planning to rearrange the seating yesterday but completely forgot. We'll do it right now."
The teacher shook the bundle of slips.
"These are slips with numbers on them. Please draw one, one by one."
She went around the room, carrying a container for everyone to draw from.
My turn came.
I reached in and picked out a slip.
I unfolded it.
Number 17.
Looking at the seating chart, the teacher spoke.
"Number 17 is... row three, seat two."
I checked the seating chart.
It was right next to Kang I-seul.
Kang I-seul checked her slip and then looked up at the seating chart.
The moment she saw who was sitting next to her...
It was Han Gyeowol.
Her heart skipped a beat.
A sensation that was both thrilling and overwhelming.
Kang I-seul quickly fixed her gaze on the teacher's podium.
Don't get flustered. It's just a seat next to him.
After we moved to our new seats, recess arrived.
Kang I-seul was the first to speak.
"Did you go to Bae Si-ah's place yesterday?"
"Yeah."
"What happened when you went to deliver the printouts?"
I thought for a moment.
It was probably best not to mention the self-harm. At least, not until Bae Si-ah decided to talk about it herself.
"When I got there, she hadn't been eating. So I just made her some food."
Kang I-seul's eyes widened.
"Food? You did?"
"Yeah."
"Did she say why she hasn't been coming to school?"
"She seemed to be struggling emotionally."
Kang I-seul froze for a moment.
"...I'm sorry. I should have gone myself. I feel like I dumped the responsibility on you when you're a boy."
"No, it was nothing. Besides, I cook all the time anyway."
Kang I-seul looked at me.
"You cook?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"No, it's just... someone who looks like you."
"What about how I look?"
Kang I-seul seemed to search for the right words.
"You look so fragile."
For a split second, I almost brought up my days as a military cook.
How I used to prep ingredients for a hundred people all by myself, or how I'd handle the massive cauldrons from the crack of dawn.
But I stopped myself.
This was a gender-reversed world. I was just a high school boy here.
"Ah, I work part-time. At a Chinese restaurant."
"A Chinese restaurant?"
"Yeah, Hongbok Banjeom. I work in the kitchen."
Kang I-seul paused.
I naturally kept talking.
"I got used to it after doing prep work and other kitchen chores there. The kitchen lady is a really good teacher, too."
"A boy working in a restaurant kitchen?"
"Why, is there a rule against it?"
"No, it's not that... I've just never heard of a guy doing that before."
Kang I-seul's voice sounded a bit different.
I looked over at her.
She was looking down.
Her cheeks were slightly flushed.
I wondered if it was just because of the way the light was streaming in from the window.
"Well, if you ever drop by while I'm working, I can get you something. Wang Hong is really generous."
"Wang Hong?"
"The owner."
Kang I-seul seemed to ponder something for a moment, then nodded.
"...I'll drop by sometime."
Her voice had grown quieter.
Internally, Kang I-seul found it incredibly strange.
Talking to Han Gyeowol didn't drain her energy at all.
When she spoke to others, she always had to consciously regulate herself—how to speak, how to smile. But with him, none of that was necessary.
The words just flowed naturally.
And his face was so close.
It was only natural since their desks were right next to each other.
His sharp, straight nose. His translucent skin catching the sunlight from the window. Every time he turned his head toward her, she caught a faint, pleasant scent.
The moment that thought crossed her mind, Kang I-seul felt her heart plummet.
This was bizarre.
She had never felt like this before.
Usually, being around boys required so much conscious effort that it drained her energy for the entire day.
But now, simply sitting next to him was making her act completely out of character.
"S-Still, I've really never seen a boy work in a place like that before."
She stammered slightly.
Han Gyeowol tilted his head.
"Why are you stuttering?"
"Oh, n-no, I'm not. I didn't stutter."
"You definitely did."
Kang I-seul shut her mouth.
Her cheeks felt burning hot.
What was this?
She had never experienced anything like this in her life.
After school, I said goodbye to Kang I-seul in front of the classroom.
She looked like she wanted to say something more, but ended up just telling me to get home safe.
I nodded and turned around.
My feet naturally carried me toward Bae Si-ah's apartment.
I was worried about her.
To be completely honest.
After seeing her state yesterday, I just couldn't bring myself to leave her alone.
I had a feeling she wasn't eating again.
Entering the apartment complex, I rode the elevator up.
I stood in front of unit 504.
I rang the doorbell.
There was no response.
I knocked on the door.
Still nothing.
I turned the doorknob.
It opened right up.
Seriously, why does this girl never lock her door?
I quietly stepped inside.
The living room lights were off.
I looked toward the sofa.
Bae Si-ah was lying there.
She was fast asleep.
Her face was free of yesterday's tense expression. She just looked peacefully asleep.
A white T-shirt. Dolphin shorts.
It was a rather dizzying sight, leaving me unsure of where to look, so I stared up at the ceiling.
Ahem.
I cleared my throat.
Ahem.
I cleared it once more.
Keeping my eyes glued to the floor, I walked over to the sofa and gently shook her shoulder.
"Hey, wake up."
Bae Si-ah squirmed.
"Hey."
I shook her again.
Bae Si-ah opened her eyes.
She blinked blankly for a moment.
Then she saw me.
She bolted upright.
"W-Why are you here?"
"Lock your door when you're home."
As the words left my mouth, I had a sudden flashback of Min Chae-ah yelling at me to lock my own door.
"No, I mean... why did you just walk in?"
"Because I was worried you'd do something stupid again."
Bae Si-ah fell silent.
I set my bag down on the floor and asked, "Have you eaten?"
"..."
"You haven't."
Her silence was answer enough.
I walked into the kitchen.
The leftover ingredients from yesterday were still in the fridge. There was some onion, green onion, eggs, and half a block of tofu.
This would do.
I pulled out a pot.
Sitting at the dining table, Bae Si-ah paused mid-bite and stopped her spoon.
"Why are you doing all this for me?"
I paused, my spoon hovering over the stew.
Why?
To be honest, I couldn't pinpoint a single, clear reason.
Was it because she reminded me of Yu Se-ah? Or was it just my own deep-seated habit?
But bringing any of that up here felt wrong.
I remained quiet for a moment.
Then, the words slipped out.
"You remind me of my younger sister."
Bae Si-ah looked up at me.
"A younger sister?"
"Yeah. I don't know, you just seem similar."
It was a lie.
I didn't have a younger sister. Not in this world, nor in my original one.
Yet, strangely enough, that excuse felt like the most natural thing to say.
Bae Si-ah stared at me for a long moment before lowering her gaze.
She didn't pry any further.
And I didn't offer any more explanations.
Only the rhythmic clinking of spoons filled the quiet room.
Outside the window, the evening shadows were slowly settling in.
Bae Si-ah ate slowly, continuing until her bowl was completely empty.
Watching her, I finished off the rest of my stew as well.