Interlude: Maid Life Journal (U, Maid of the Fortress)
"Welcome back, Seven."
"Oh, U. Good work today."
Greetings.
I am U of Yeoro. Meris Helus.
Ah — no, that won't do.
Senior M told me that every maid must possess an aesthetic entirely her own.
Senior M's aesthetic is the Perfect Maid. Mine is none other than the Muscle Maid — so that refined way of speaking simply does not suit me.
Ahem. How do ya do.
I'm U of Yeoro, Meris Helus, that I am.
Yeah. Changing my speech like this really brings out the muscle vibe.
I still fall short of Senior M's maid power, but one day I'll become such an incredible Muscle Maid that even she has to acknowledge me.
"One is waiting for you."
"Okay, I'll head right over."
Senior said a maid must review and reflect on the day's work — that it is of the utmost importance.
Is it the same principle as checking which muscles you wrecked during training?
Either way, Senior advised it, so starting today I'll keep a journal like this.
Started cleaning with full energy again today.
Sweeping the floors with my custom-ordered three-hundred-kilogram broom makes both my maid power and my muscle power surge — feels great.
"Heheh… heheheheh…"
Just as I was about to enjoy the morning scream of my own muscles, a nasty laugh drifted over.
That was definitely Eight's room — she must have left the door open.
Senior calls Eight a pervert and can't stand her, and honestly, I find Eight a bit much myself.
Even with the mask hiding her eyes, the sticky way she stares at Senior makes me deeply uncomfortable.
"M… I'm going to find you no matter what…"
As far as Yeoro knows, Senior is dead.
Seven told everyone she and V wiped each other out.
But I know Senior is alive.
Before she left for Preas, she told me her grand plan.
So how does Eight keep insisting Senior is alive when she doesn't even know that?
It's a little scary.
I just quietly shut Eight's door and left it at that.
A maid's morning starts earlier than anyone else's!
Rising first, finishing the cleaning, and providing people with the optimal living space — that is a maid's mission!
But the people of the fortress were still snoring away.
I killed my presence as much as possible and started cleaning.
"Ha! Dragon Blade, Storm Slash!"
While I was cleaning, a racket rose from in front of the training hall.
Who on earth was yelling in the training hall at this hour of the morning?
"Hmm, no. Storm Slash still isn't cool enough. I need to shout the technique name more naturally — and sexier."
Ah. The culprit was Seven.
He had pulled out the full martial manual in the training hall and was apparently researching techniques.
But wasn't the full manual supposed to be a secret weapon no one else should know about?
Is it normal to shout its techniques out loud like that?
I get it if it's magic that requires chanting, but do sword techniques really need shouted names? I had my doubts.
Well — he must have a reason for it.
Surely someone of the Numbers wouldn't think yelling technique names like a little kid is cool… right?
"Then I shall take my leave, U."
"Understood."
Screeeeeech! Slam!
Ugh. This iron door really is a problem.
A proper door should open and close without a sound, but this iron one always scrapes the floor and makes a huge racket.
One of these days I'm fixing that door for good.
Disaster.
The chickens I've been raising so carefully have vanished…!
I need those fresh raw eggs every morning for my protein!
Who the hell would do something like this…!
Wait. Don't tell me…!
"Six…!"
"Oh my. U."
I rushed to the far edge of the fortress, and sure enough — the culprit was that damn Number Six…!
The three chickens cradled against her flat chest were without a doubt Alex, Kane, and Ella, the ones who top up my protein every morning!
"Why did you take my chickens?!"
"Heh. You don't even know? As one who has become an elf, I cannot tolerate carnivorous habits. Chickens are living creatures in their own right. They must return to nature's embrace."
What kind of garbage is that.
I know elves are friendly with animals, but that doesn't mean you have to go full dog yourself.
"Six! Elves eat meat too! The race with the best hunters is elves — what do you mean they don't eat meat?!"
"Eh? Ah — aah! Elves hunt within the embrace of Mother Nature, don't they? Living in a fortress like this, these little ones must feel trapped, don't you think? Come now, children — hurry back to Mother's arms!"
Wait. Hold on.
What is that crazy woman doing?
Did she just… throw the chickens outside the fortress…?
"Why would you throw chickens that can't even fly outside the fortress?!"
"What bird can't fly? Besides, when I went to catch them today they were flying around and I barely managed to grab them. Don't talk nonsense."
"Chickens bred for meat and eggs have degenerate wing function! They can't stay airborne for long! You're an elf and you don't even know that?!"
"Eh?"
I hurriedly leaned out in the direction my chicken trio had fallen.
Cock-a-doodle-doooooooo!
The three of them flapped their wings, trying desperately to fly — and promptly plummeted.
At least they were together to the end. That was a comfort.
Ah — no. Kane is stepping on Alex's head, trying to climb up alone.
Pointless thrashing either way…
"Sixxxxxxxxxxxxx……!"
"Hmm. Come to think of it, One called for me. I'll be going, then?"
I grabbed Six by the head on the spot and hurled her outside the fortress.
Until I get those three chickens back, Six is not setting foot in this fortress again.
"The Banished — you mean those ancient calamities?"
The ancient calamities known as the Banished.
They are beings from histories and myths the world over.
Calamities and natural enemies of humankind — where they were born, and why they oppose humanity, has never been made clear.
Most of the Banished now lie dormant or sealed, but I still remember the chaos thirteen years ago when one facet of them — the venomous dragon Hydra — awoke in the Leonhart ducal territory.
I also heard that the daughter-in-law of House Leonhart was infected by the Hydra's venom and died.
"Yes. Before long, one of the Banished will open its eyes."
"How does One even know that? Actually — asking that now feels a little weird."
The Banished. Even knowing One is a strange person who knows far too much, I never expected information like that.
"The one about to wake is the two-headed hound Orthros. U. I will give you Orthros's seal site. Go there, check the state of the seal, and report back."
This mission looks like it will run long.
Having to set aside maid work for a while is deeply regrettable, but as a member of Yeoro, Yeoro's missions take top priority.
Still, so I don't forget the feeling of being a maid, I'll wear my maid uniform while I'm out.
"Six will accompany you on the mission."
"What?"
Oh, for fuck's sake.
"By the way, Blanc."
"You called for me, my lady?"
Leonhart Manor.
Noir savored the strawberry parfait Blanc had prepared for her, enjoying the garden view.
"Did you learn this kind of skill in Yeoro as well?"
"Ah…"
Blanc could not answer Noir's question.
Her cooking and confectionery skills were all things she had learned in her previous life, before possessing Blanc's body — and there was no way to explain that to Noir.
"I see. So that's how it is… All right. You don't have to answer."
"Pardon?"
Watching Blanc roll her eyes without a word, Noir nodded as if she had understood something perfectly.
Blanc had no idea what Noir thought she understood, but since she no longer had to answer the question, she decided to let it go.
Damn it, those Yeoro bastards. They must have worked little Blanc like a slave…!
That had to be why she was forced to learn cooking skills like these — to feed the people of Yeoro.
It had been strange from the beginning.
From her very first day as a maid, Blanc had been proficient not only in maid duties but also in massage, acupuncture, medicine — skills that had little to do with being a maid at all.
Clearly Yeoro had forced those skills onto her and worked her like a slave…!
From start to finish it was an absurd leap of logic, but Noir already thought of Blanc as a pitiful child whose life had been ruined by Yeoro. In her mind, Yeoro was nothing but garbage that had done only the unforgivable to Blanc — a blight on humanity that needed to be purged as soon as possible.
"Blanc. You aren't being forced into this kind of work since coming to Leonhart Manor, are you?"
"Of course not. I remain at your side of my own will, my lady. I wish only to attend you like this, always."
"I-is that so? Haha, I see! Yes… that's how it is…"
Noir lowered her head and spooned more of the parfait Blanc had made into her mouth.
It was a cold parfait — and yet her face only grew hotter.