Chapter 84
Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 84
Chapter Title: Epilogue - Luca (2)
Eli, who had poured out all her strength in an instant, could barely walk. I had no intention of making her trudge back through this snowy field anyway, so I hoisted her onto my back and headed home.
The familiar warmth and the gentle mint flower scent enveloping me danced before my eyes, but my complicated feelings offered no comfort. There was only one thought filling my mind.
Where should I even start?
And how far should I go?
I couldn't find the words, so I just kept walking in silence for a long while.
Crunch. Crunch.
"..."
But Eli never rushed me. She simply rested her head quietly on my shoulder, letting out soft breaths.
The sound of our feet sinking into the snow. My sweat-soaked back and swaying hair. Feeling all of it, Eli hugged my shoulders tighter. Her breathing was as calm as if she were asleep, whispering into my ear.
Then, at some point, the snow began to fall.
A tiny snowflake drifted slowly onto my eyebrow. Before I knew it, it melted between my eyes. Looking up through my blurred vision, I saw waves of white crashing down to blanket the world. In just a little more time, all the scars on the earth would be hidden beneath the snow.
But that was only temporary. When spring came, the snow would melt, revealing those wounds once more. To cover such hideous scars, I'd have to scatter seeds and let new sprouts emerge.
Yeah.
To hide a wound, you need someone else's touch.
The touch of someone who knows what that wound looks like.
So I opened my mouth.
"Actually, Eli..."
"Yeah."
My words froze in my throat for a moment. I forced my cracked lips apart and uttered the words I'd buried deep for so long.
"I've already lost you once."
"Yeah."
"Because I was stupid. Because I was lacking. I lost you once. So I decided to fix my mistake. And that's how I got you back."
"Maybe..."
"..."
"Could you explain it in more detail?"
"..."
My wound was too hideous. That's why it ran so deep and ached so fiercely. But even so, I brought it out. Hiding it would only make it fester and scar worse. Because I believed you'd understand.
My lips, filled with resolve, turned back toward those memories of pain. As if sensing my agony, Eli hugged my shoulders even tighter. Feeling that weight, I slowly began to speak.
"The year I turned twenty, a knight came to find me."
And so I began telling my story once more in the snowy field. Not to you, who was familiar with my tale of failure.
To her.
Whoosh...
One of the black logs burning in the fireplace crumbled into ash. The story that had begun with pure white snowflakes continued until my hands were covered in black soot. Every time I tossed a dry log into the flames, the nightmare flared up alongside it. But it never vanished. It merely turned to ash and piled on the floor.
I tried to recount it as calmly as possible, but by the end, my voice was choked. Choked with what, I couldn't say. Pain, perhaps. Or tears. Eli listened to it all, sitting by the fire with her knees hugged to her chest. Sometimes nodding, sometimes stroking my halted throat.
The story only stopped as the sun set and twilight darkness filled the house. Even after finishing, I remained sunk in those lingering ripples, silent for a long time. Eli watched me, then finally spoke after a while.
"I see."
"..."
"I see."
She repeated those words, then sighed faintly upon seeing my expression and stretched out her legs.
"Feels like I shouldn't have asked."
"No. It was a story I had to tell someday."
"But it was way harder than I thought."
"...Yeah."
Yeah. It was too hard a story. For you, and for me.
I fed the last log into the fire and bowed my head slightly. The scar I'd finally exposed throbbed painfully. Eli gazed at me, then slowly approached and leaned her back against my empty chest, becoming my windbreaker. I hugged her shoulders tight, craving that warmth more than ever today.
Eli melted into my arms without resistance, stroking my interlaced hands and pressing her lips to them. She whispered just one word.
"Thank you."
Hearing "thank you" always made "I'm sorry" rise to my throat. But this time, I held it back. It might reopen the wound I'd just covered. So I said just one thing.
"Yeah."
There were no more words I could say. Instead, I chose to savor this warmth more, hugging Eli tighter. Hoping this wound would one day heal from the searing heat. We stayed like that for a good, long while.
...
"By the way, Luca. Can I ask one thing?"
After a long silence, Eli slowly spoke. Her voice carried its usual playfulness. She wanted to make me smile, it seemed. I appreciated the thought, but I wasn't sure it'd work.
"What?"
"Well... it might sound a bit weird."
Eli unwrapped her arms and turned to face me, flashing her signature eye smile.
"You really never did it with any other girl?"
"Did what?"
"You know..."
"Oh."
I rubbed my eyes and sighed. Yeah. It was an important question. That one.
"I told you. Never once."
"I mean... I heard you out, but there must've been some parts you skipped or embellished, right? Really, never?"
"Are you asking if I ever cheated?"
"Not exactly, but... you had plenty of chances. You met tons of people, some who admired you as a hero, and even if it's not disrespecting you, you went to places like that in Miler too. You're a guy... it was a long journey... lots of stress and all..."
"I said no."
A laugh escaped me unwittingly. Seeing Eli flustered with embarrassment after so long lifted my sunken mood a bit. Even in this situation, she'd managed to make me smile.
"Really?"
"Yeah. Really."
"Okay?"
"Yeah."
"Uh-huh..."
Eli scratched her cheek awkwardly and averted her eyes slightly. Then, in a voice barely audible, she said,
"I'm a little happy."
"Why?"
"Just... even though you've already lived the future, we still have our first time together ahead."
"Oh..."
Her words made even me feel a flush of shyness. I'd never thought of it that way. Sharing a "first" was more joyful than I'd imagined.
The ticklish sensation between us quieted our words, and our heads naturally bowed. Suddenly, primal desire stirred, and my eyes traced Eli's sweat-dampened nape unbidden.
Why had I held back all this time? We'd moved homes and spent many sleepless nights together, but crossing that line beyond friendship had always felt impossible. Busy, tired—plenty of excuses. But really, it was because I wanted to treat her preciously. I'd endured for so long, but she hadn't. She might still feel overwhelmed. I'd thought to hold off a bit longer.
"Hoo..."
"..."
But today, somehow, it felt okay to cross that line. My fingers moved on their own.
I brushed aside Eli's damp hair, cupped her cheek, and met her eyes. Her toes, which had been wiggling in my arms, curled slightly, scraping the floor. I gazed into those tense brown eyes and, as always, pressed my lips to hers.
It was still just another scene from our daily life. But I had no intention of stopping there. Wanting to cross the line we'd never breached. Wanting to know the you even the future hadn't shown me. I probed inside with my tongue.
"Mm..."
As the wet tongue slipped between her lips, Eli let out an awkward moan. Unfamiliar with the sensation, she lightly gripped my arm but didn't push away. Emboldened, I pressed a step closer. Our collars rustled against each other.
"Ah... mm..."
"Haa..."
Our tongues intertwined, saliva flowed freely between lips, a faint sweetness on the tips. But it wasn't some grand taste. Our mouths burned unbearably, consciousness blurring with something beyond mere heat. I didn't know what emotion it was, but one thing was clear: I never wanted to pull away.
"Mm... mmm..."
Eli felt the same; she clung to my shoulders. But as strength ebbed from her, her body tilted downward, back hitting the floor with a dull thud. With the faint impact, we slowly parted our lips.
"Mm... ha... ah..."
"Haa... ha..."
A thin thread of saliva stretched long, snapping as our breaths mingled, dripping onto our clothes. Panting and staring into each other's eyes, we burst into laughter for no reason. Maybe to ease the awkwardness.
"Haa..."
But as the laughter faded, irresistible instinct reared again. My gaze drifted to Eli's heaving chest. I reached out, gripped the thin fabric, and met her eyes. As our sticky stares locked, my hand slowly peeled away the fabric into forbidden territory beyond friendship. When flushed skin emerged, I was drawn like a magnet to kiss her again.
"Mm... mmph..."
"Haaa..."
Our tongues met naturally now. Between them, my hand caressed soft skin. The slim waist I'd playfully poked once. The small back I'd touched inside her clothes to remove a bug. The soft belly I'd kneaded in childish teasing. My palm ventured past those dizzying memories toward the innermost depths. As that secret texture teased my nerves, I grasped her soft breast.
"Haa...!"
Eli gasped sharply, head tilting back. I leaned down, pressing deeply to her nape. Her ragged breaths transmitted through my lips to my throat, making my own breath roughen.
"Haa... haa..."
"Ngh... ahn..."
Rubbing her breast, I lightly teased the damp nipple, drawing the first sweet moan from Eli's lips. Taking it as a signal, I caressed her body everywhere, leaving lip marks. White nape, soft arms, ticklish sides, slightly protruding nipples—like marking my territory, my lips swept diligently until they crossed her waist downward.
"Ahng... haah... ahn..."
Each lip touch made Eli swallow her breath; she rubbed her thighs, inching her underwear down. But the center clung wetly, only the edges sliding off. I grasped the end and pulled it away.
"Haa..."
A tense breath escaped. Mine or hers, I couldn't tell. I set the underwear aside and lightly stroked her inner thigh with my palm. At that, Eli's body jerked wildly, a shrill voice bursting out.
"W-Wait...!"
"Ugh."
My rising hand was gripped hard. As her nails dug in, Eli startled and clamped her own mouth. Panting with wide eyes, she seemed utterly flustered by the sudden pleasure. Something beyond tickling. I stroked her smooth legs and kissed her inner thigh.
"Ngh...! Ah...! Aahk...!"
The reaction intensified. Muffled moans leaked through her hand; her widened eyes swirled with emotions. Unfamiliar pleasure, fear of the heat surging inside. And a hint of anticipation. The closer, deeper my lips went, the wilder her hips bucked. Eli squeezed her eyes shut, desperately suppressing the waves, as if unsure what was trying to flow from her body.
To reassure her, I kissed her again. No tongue this time—just lips overlapping, one hand still stroking her inner thigh.
"Haa... hng... mm... ngh..."
Eli clung to my hair passionately, as if the kiss were salvation, channeling her boiling desire elsewhere. But in that lapse of guard, my fingers slipped deeper. The moment they pressed the hidden core beneath her skirt, Eli arched back, unleashing her pent-up moan.
"Nngh...! Haaa...! Haaaang...!"
Sticky, hot fluid trickled between my fingers. Soaking my hand, its indescribable scent wafted, surging something within me. Realizing I couldn't hold back, I shed my pants, pressing my hardened length to her below. Slick flesh barely enveloped the tip.
"Ah... ahng... aa..."
Still lost in aftershocks, panting Eli looked down as something prodded her. I met her eyes briefly through tousled hair, then slowly thrust my hips forward.
"Haauk...!"
Painful moan as the tip entered. Though softened plenty, the fear of "first" lingered. Eli pulled my arm in terror; I kissed her, drawing her trembling shoulders close. Soft breasts pressed against my skin.
"Mmph... mm..."
"Haa... haa..."
Kissing, caressing skin, licking insides—I slowly dismantled her fear. Gently stroking her hair relaxed her rigid legs. Inch by inch, I delved deeper.
"Mmph... haa... ahuk...!"
Soon, a fishy fluid mingled with her arousal trickled down. Blood scent mixing with pheromones spurred my hips rougher. Eli parted lips, biting my shoulder hard.
"Hngk... ah..."
"Eli..."
Would that ease the pain? I whispered her name cautiously. Pleasure dripped unmistakably from my voice too. Hesitating briefly, I resolved and hugged her tighter.
And thrust fully inside.
"Nuuugh...!"
Feeling pain and pleasure surge, Eli bit my shoulder harder. Saliva dripped as slick walls clenched me.
"Aa... ugh..."
"Hng... mm..."
She still bit down. But as I began moving, she parted lips, spilling hot moans.
"Haa... haaang..."
"Haa... ugh... ah..."
Each withdrawal and thrust rocked her hips, fluids flowing. Embarrassed by the sticky trail down her thighs, Eli wrapped her legs around my waist, clinging tight. Body heat intensified, heartbeats syncing as one.
"Haa... Eli..."
"Lucaaa... haaaang...!"
Calling names fueled the heat; her hips bucked wildly. As if she couldn't endure otherwise, Eli moaned with mouth agape. Unable to resist her sweet voice ringing in my ears, I plunged uncontrollably.
"Haa... haa..."
"Mm... haaaang... haaaaang...!"
Voice, saliva, overflowing fluids, peak slickness—something hot surged to the end. Sensing climax, I rocked harder; Eli clung closer, biting her lip.
"Haa... haaa..."
"Hng... haaaang... ahng..."
Skin grinding, fluids indistinguishable—we fused as one. As pounding hearts echoed in my mind, I couldn't hold back, pouring everything inside.
"Haa... nngh...!"
"Aaaang...! Haa... haah... ugh... aa...!"
Unknown heat filling her, Eli trembled in overwhelming fear and ecstasy, clutching my hair, moaning. Her quivering cries spasmed my hips, etching my presence deep within for what felt like eternity.
"Haa... haa..."
"Ah...! Aa... ha... haak...!"
Finished, I slowly rose, bracing the floor. As it withdrew from deep inside, Eli's hips bucked, white fluid spilling as she dropped back.
"Hak...! Hak...! Haa...! Ha...! Ah..."
Eli panted uncontrollably, overwhelmed by inner joy. Wet hair tickled her mouth unnoticed, lost in first climax's afterglow. I gently brushed it aside, wiping her sweat tenderly. Only then did her eyes turn to me.
"Haak... haa... ha... ah..."
"Haa... hoo..."
Locking eyes, we stared long, then laughed for no reason. I don't know why she laughed. For me, joy and awkwardness at this long-awaited moment overflowed into laughter.
"Haha... ah... haha..."
"Haa... hahaha... mm..."
Laughing as usual, Eli gazed at me, smile lingering, eyes more tender. Feeling awkward, I scratched my jaw. Was this first-night clumsiness? A word I'd sworn not to say slipped out.
"Um... was it okay...?"
I couldn't ask "How was it?" but it was embarrassing enough. Regret flushed my already red face hotter. But Eli didn't mock—instead, she bit her lip, stroking my cheek.
"Well."
Arms around my shoulders, she rose, whispering,
"Not sure yet."
...
"Yeah?"
I asked; Eli nodded shyly without words. Needing no more talk, I moved my lips first. We kissed deeply again.
The night without dawn stars burned too hot. To cool the heat, I still needed you.