Chapter 8
Chapter 8
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Translator: crow
Chapter Title: Strange Guy (1)
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I sat in the empty on-call room chair, staring blankly into space.
My mind was persistently haunted by the deranged comment left by 'Truck-Hitter Guy.'
'If you haven't been hit, shut your mouth.'
Fuck.
Yeah, I haven't been hit.
And I don't want to get hit either, you crazy bastard.
Sighing as I looked at these ghosts who wouldn't grow up even in death.
Hmm...
Let me sort this out.
So far, I've just been lurking in this database, passively absorbing whatever info trickles out.
Like when I posted about the FUO patient—if someone luckily gives an answer, great; otherwise, nothing.
This won't do.
It's way too inefficient.
To properly tame and exploit these bastards, I need to clearly show my hand.
'I'm alive.'
That one sentence.
I have to etch that fact deep into the brains of these ghost fuckers.
'Alright, let's do this.'
I jumped up from my seat.
The problem is how to prove it.
"Proof, huh."
The simplest way is a selfie.
Snap a pic of my face and post it.
I pondered for a moment, then shook my head vigorously.
Am I insane?
Imagining myself with a rotten expression, drawing a V-sign in this dingy on-call room—my hands and feet shriveled up so bad they might vanish.
That didn't fit my personality. More than that, the thought of these ghost bastards holding a critique session on my face gave me chills.
Comments like 'This guy's looks scream "all study, no life" lol' were inevitable.
So, another way?
What about snapping a screenshot of the EMR (*Electronic Medical Record) screen?
Patient lists and prescription records. Nothing proves you're a doctor more definitively.
'...No.'
A warning alarm blared in my head.
'Violation of the Personal Information Protection Act.'
Patient names, ages, diagnoses.
All sensitive info. Leaking that could cost my medical license—and land me in red-hot trouble.
But wait.
"They're ghosts, aren't they?"
Right?
Yeah. They're already dead.
Ghosts who can't face legal judgment or interfere with the real world.
Does the Personal Information Protection Act extend to the afterlife? Do they have a cyber investigation unit in hell sending notices like 'Hel Joseon Slave 1, you're summoned for unauthorized personal data leak'?
The mere thought was absurd, but you never know. Better avoid high-risk gambles.
After much deliberation, I came up with the most perfect and safe method.
Patient monitor.
Heart rate, blood pressure, oxygen saturation.
That monitor blinking with real-time vital signs of a living person.
No personal info at all, yet it proves beyond doubt that this is an operational hospital right now.
Perfect. Let's go with that.
I glanced around, grabbed a Post-it note and a pen, and boldly wrote six characters symbolizing my identity.
[Hel Joseon Slave 1]
Prep done.
I slipped quietly out of the on-call room toward the ER station. Luckily, everyone was busy—no one paid attention to a cornered first-year resident.
I approached the patient monitor by an empty bed in Section B.
Beep- Beep- Beep-
Perfect backdrop.
I stuck the Post-it in a visible corner of the monitor. Opened the gallery app, hit capture.
Click.
Back to the on-call room, I flopped onto the bed.
No need for a fancy title.
Short and punchy.
Title: Proof. The real deal you've been looking for.
No body text. Just the photo. Added one short sentence below.
'Taking questions.'
Now I'm the boss.
Heh heh heh.
Deep breath.
Hit post.
And then.
After one second of silence,
Comment notifications exploded simultaneously.
[New comment posted.]
[New comment posted.]
[New comment posted.]
[New comment posted.]
[New comment posted.]
The gallery blew up.
Anonymous (1.234): Wtf, why does this look so real?
Anonymous (211.36): Hey fuck, this isn't photoshopped? That Post-it font looks like total dogshit?
Hippocrates' Heir: O living one, you truly exist in the present world!
Bone Fanatic 88: Holy fuck, so you can actually show me that bone marrow slide I asked for? Hey! Answer me! I'm fucking hyped right now!
ㄴ Anonymous (118.235): Not curious, fuck off you perv.
Pediatrics Ghost 77: You motherfucker!!!! It's real?!?! Hurry to peds ER and check if RSV (*Respiratory Syncytial Virus, infant respiratory virus) is trending with the kids right now!!!!!! Urgent as fuck!!!!!!
Anesthesiology Pain Medicine: What's that monitor model? It's so shiny af;;
God's Scalpel: Intriguing. Any emergency surgeries going on right now? Laparoscopic or open, doesn't matter. Share the surgical view.
Truck-Hitter Guy: Hey!!!!!!!!!! Does your hospital have a trauma center!!!!
Satisfied, I scrolled down. Ghosts from every department were desperately pitching their specialties to me like lovesick suitors.
God's Scalpel: O living one. How do you surgically manage aortic dissection in your era?
Pediatrics Ghost 77: Hey!!! Can't you hear me? Peds!! Go to peds!! What're kids dying most from these days!! I need to take care of them!! Kids are super sensitive too!!
Hippocrates' Heir: Astonishing, this is proof of life itself!
I lowered the hand from my forehead and opened the compose window again.
Title: Everyone calm down
Author: Hel Joseon Slave 1
I'll be posting tough cases from time to time.
Throw me a few patient details, and you spill everything you know like before.
Win-win, right?
Post.
The reaction was exponentially more explosive than before.
Anonymous (14.52): Hell yeah!!!!!!!!
Anonymous (210.94): Obviously fuck yeah!! 100%!!
Bone Fanatic 88: Cases? What cases? Osteomyelitis? Osteosarcoma? Spinal TB? I'll handle 'em all.
Latte is Just Words: If it's internal medicine, this old timer's experience will help.
OR Wall Clock: Fuck internal med boomers, bring surgical cases to me first, my laparoscopic views are god-tier ㅇㅇ.
God's Scalpel: Reasonable proposal. Accepted.
Truck-Hitter Guy: So does it have a trauma center or not fuck!!!!!!!!
Ghosts from every department started bickering over who was the real expert.
Is this how idols or celebs feel?
This is plenty.
Now with this powerful weapon in hand, I can steadily farm LP and snag the possession skill.
Right at that moment.
"Hyun-jae sunbae!"
I jolted up, head snapping around.
"B-22 bed patient—looks like fever's spiking a bit. Come check?"
"Yeah! Got it!"
I sprang from my seat.
Ding- Ding-
Noisy patient monitor alarms. Drunk yells echoing from afar. The sting of disinfectant in my nose.
This is my reality.
"Fuck, back to work."
Muttering curses under my breath, I trudged toward B-22.
***
Emergency Medicine Chief Resident, fourth-year Lee Min-jae, stared quietly at first-year Han Hyun-jae's retreating back.
He'd directly called the rheumatology professor to diagnose Bexas syndrome, a rare disease, and just hours later nailed ciguatera poisoning from tropical fish toxin.
This from a first-year with barely months under his belt?
His mind flashed through the past few months' records.
Han Hyun-jae.
This wasn't his character.
"...Hyun-jae, you struggling a lot?"
A patient hauled in with alcoholic liver cirrhosis.
Hitting thin, inelastic veins is tricky. But this was rough.
Hyun-jae was sweating bullets, poking the patient's arm four times, the patient looking resigned.
Finally, he turned to the nurse.
"Senior, sorry, can you get the line instead?"
Hyun-jae couldn't even lift his head, mumbling apologies like an ant.
Far from ace material.
Just your average green first-year.
"Hyun-jae, this patient's chief complaint is epigastric pain. Top differential?"
"Acute gastritis most likely! Consider EGD if needed!"
"Then what labs to order?"
"Basic CBC, LFTs, and inflammatory markers!"
Answers loud and clear.
"Not differentiating acute pancreatitis? No lipase stat?"
"......Ah!"
Exclamation like it just hit him.
Those mistakes are common in early first-year days.
That's exactly it.
Not exceptionally brilliant, nor a total disaster needing constant hand-holding.
Yeah, good heart, diligent.
Just that kind of kid.
Clumsy, sometimes pitiful, but grinding through his duties.
But today's Hyun-jae was a completely different person.
Like a veteran professor, he'd snagged two rare diseases back-to-back.
'What the hell? What happened in the meantime?'
People don't change overnight without reason.
'Did he... study like a madman?'
Min-jae stopped his thoughts there.