I Want to Die
I want to die. I want to die. Fuck. Right now, the source of my black history was standing in front of me.
“S-sorry... What kind of disgraceful behavior...”
“Hahaha.”
And Kim Se-rin the cheerleader chuckled as she watched me kneeling with my head bowed.
“No, it was nothing. The marketing team leader might misunderstand, though.”
“Still...”
“Let's just get going. I already picked a place.”
I flinched.
“Do we have to do this today?”
I put on my most pitiful expression, but it was no use.
“Didn't someone just apologize to me? Hurry up and get ready. Carry my suitcase too.”
... No escaping this.
I quickly loaded the suitcase into the trunk and opened the passenger door.
“G-get in.”
“Hahaha. You're hilarious. Alright, I'm getting in.”
Kim Se-rin the cheerleader laughed again at my expense as she climbed into the car.
I drove with Kim Se-rin in the passenger seat, heading to the restaurant she'd already inputted into the navigation.
I tried to act casual while following the GPS directions, but laughter kept coming from beside me.
“Why? Why do you keep laughing?”
“Hu-seong-ah. You know your face is super red right now?”
“... Yeah, I figured.”
“Hahaha. What are we gonna do about this?”
Kim Se-rin reached out and touched my cheek. A slightly cool sensation spread, cooling my burning face a bit.
“Hahaha. So cute.”
She started kneading and pinching.
“Ah...”
Before I knew it, Kim Se-rin was fiddling with my cheeks and pinching them.
“Oh! You've put on a little weight, huh? They didn't used to feel like this.”
“Haha... That's a relief, then.”
- You have arrived at your destination. Voice guidance ending.
The navigation chimed in right then.
“We're here.”
“Yeah, let's go in.”
The moment I saw the sign upon arrival, my heart skipped a beat.
This was... an eel restaurant.
My expression nearly froze. The image of it as a stamina food flashed in my mind first, leaving me a bit flustered.
I casually closed the car door and followed her inside.
The place was cleaner than expected, with a subtle charcoal aroma wafting through.
The second we sat down, Kim Se-rin stared straight at me and narrowed her eyes.
“But Hu-seong-ah, why'd you flinch when we came in? Scared of what I might do?”
I knew she was teasing, but it still flustered me more.
I shook my head with a forced laugh.
“No. Just... I haven't eaten eel much.”
Even as I said it, it felt lame. It was such an obvious excuse.
But Kim Se-rin nodded like it was fascinating.
“Ah~ Is that so? Yeah, some people just never get into it. Me neither. I looked it up, and eel's in season from now until August.”
Then she traced her finger in the air like listing an order and rattled off her plan.
“I'm thinking we'll rotate restaurants for a while. Seafood one time, beef next, pork, chicken... and eel. Like that.”
Her expression turned expectant at the end.
“What do you think?”
Oh~! This was actually great.
“Sounds good. Honestly, gorging on just one or two types of food until you're stuffed sounds awful...”
Kim Se-rin grinned in satisfaction.
Then she eagerly pulled over the menu.
“Seasoned or salted?”
I paused for a second.
“Um... I think seasoned was tasty.”
I tried to sound natural, but the moment I finished, she raised an eyebrow and burst out laughing.
“You say you haven't had it much, but you know your stuff.”
My stomach dropped at that one line.
I flinched again, cursing myself inwardly as I fiddled with my water glass and averted my eyes.
But Kim Se-rin found my reaction hilarious and leaned forward with a mischievous grin.
She said lightly,
“Since you lied, you're eating a lot today.”
“...”
Uh...
“S-spare me.”
“Spare you? When your Se-rin noona, who's dying to feed you, is offering?”
Haa... I really want to die.
Meanwhile, in Gwangju, the Gocheok Turkeys' away game prep meeting was underway with intense scrutiny.
The conference room air hung heavy as the Gwangju Pigeons manager crossed his arms and spoke.
“You all prepared for the Turkeys matchup?”
The question was simple, but it carried the weight of we have to win this time.
Having been swept in the opening series twice already, the pressure was natural.
The pitching coach nodded immediately.
“Hitters' analysis is mostly done. Most of their annoying guys are down, so it's manageable.”
But the manager didn't let it end there. He turned his gaze sharply to the crux.
“And Kim Hu-seong, our biggest problem right now—what's the plan?”
The room fell silent for a moment.
Even if the other hitters were neutralized, that one guy could shake the whole series.
The pitching coach jumped in like he'd been waiting.
“We've got all of Kim Hu-seong's weaknesses pinned down. We'll exploit them completely this time.”
“Which weaknesses?”
“From reviewing his plays, our suspicions turned into certainties. He can't hit breaking balls. And he struggles with slow fastballs, so we can induce fly outs with deliberate off-speed fastballs.”
“Really? That's solid intel?”
“Yes. Plus, unlike our home park, Gocheok Turkeys Stadium is pitcher-friendly, so baiting with fastballs for fly outs works in our favor.”
The hitting coach chimed in right away.
“Pitching matchup's even easier. Turkeys lost a ton of pitchers to injuries, so we've got clear paths.”
The Pigeons hitting coach checked off the Turkeys pitchers' names again.
“Their starters might be tough, but the bullpen's vulnerable. Plan's to target from the 5th—when the starter tires—through the 9th, crumbling them over those five innings.”
The manager nodded at the sound logic.
The hitting coach hammered the final nail.
“No Jo Seon-jae, no Lee Tae-sin, no closer, only one reliable setup guy. This is our shot.”
“Good. Let's make it happen this time.”
I was getting ready for the game.
Today's opponent: Gwangju Pigeons.
I was always primed to crush them, but oddly, the old burning hatred wasn't there anymore.
Maybe... because lately, my own team, the Turkeys, felt more unlikable.
Or perhaps getting that satisfying sweep in the opener had cooled my rage a bit.
Anyway...
“Urrrp.”
My stomach felt off, and even while warming up, that heavy pressure near my solar plexus kept nagging.
Should I switch my drinks to carbonated from now on... This bulking is getting tougher....
That's when Hwang Do-yoon hyung approached.
He playfully tapped my shoulder and asked casually,
“Hu-seong-ah, you seem to be in a good mood lately. Things going well with the cheerleader?”
I flinched at that.
Useless scenes flashed through my mind, crumpling my face.
I pondered how to respond and came up with the best reply.
“Urrrp.”
A burp escaped.
I waved my hand with an even more sour expression.
“Please don't talk about that.”
And again.
“Urrrrp.”
Another burp followed.
Hwang Do-yoon hyung's eyes widened before he burst out laughing.
“Whoa, impressive results.”
He already knew about the online buzz of my bulking dates with Kim Se-rin the cheerleader.
“This that bulking date stuff from the internet? You definitely look heavier.”
“Huh? What date?”
“Bulking date. Word is Kim Se-rin the cheerleader's fattening you up?”
“...”
Facts.
“Urrrp.”
I burped instead of arguing.
“Alright, got it. No comment, huh?”
Then he added cruelly,
“But why's your distance not increasing even though you're gaining weight?”
This fucker! That's my frustration too.
Why isn't the distance growing despite the weight gain...
“That's the frustrating part—please stop bringing it up.”
Hwang Do-yoon hyung shrugged with a casual chuckle.
“Still, you're doing great. Batting .350—monster stuff. Double-digit homers already. How much better you gonna get?”
I shrugged my shoulders.
“Gotta get better.”
“Yeah, game's starting soon. Let's prep.”
Moments later, I took the field.
Batting third, I stepped up in the bottom of the first with two outs.
The Pigeons suspected me, so they were wary from the start. I pulled out Plan A: gauge starter Thompson's reactions early.
But the first pitch made me grimace.
Whiiiiiif
Smack!
“Strike.”
Thompson threw the first one right down the middle—a slow fastball.
Clocked at 141 km/h.
Not like the Thompson who averaged 150.
No way...
Shiiiif
Smack!
The second was even worse. Another strike-zone curve, nearly center.
Confirming these arrogant pitches coming right into the zone, a chill ran down my neck instead.
Hold on...
They know everything?