Don't Get Too Obsessed With Voodoo
After finishing a meal that had dragged on longer than expected,
“Hey, Noah.”
Dohyun said as he started doing the dishes.
‘You made all the food, so I’ll handle the dishes!’
Noah had insisted at first, but after she shattered a single plate with a loud crash, Dohyun had no choice but to take over.
“Why did you lie about your name earlier?”
At Dohyun’s follow-up question,
“Ah, um, I didn’t lie. I didn’t lie. I-I didn’t…”
The word ‘lie’ seemed to act as a trigger. Noah’s breathing grew sharp and ragged.
“Lie… no. Sorry. It wasn’t a lie, I just… um… why did you say your name wrong?”
“I-I, that’s, I mean, sorry, I’m so sorry, I’m sorry.”
“...”
Dohyun silently reminded himself that he had to be extremely careful with every single word he used.
Once Noah’s panic had subsided a little,
“Um… it’s because… your mom still doesn’t know I’ve become a girl, right? And it was just… kind of embarrassing…”
Noah answered in a timid, shrinking voice.
“Ahhh…”
Now that he thought about it, Noah had always told him never to mention anything about her to her mother. Even back when Noah was still a boy, she’d said the same thing. It had seemed a bit strange at the time, but since she asked, Dohyun had never brought up anything about her at home.
Well, if the person herself didn’t want it, what could he do?
Besides, they rarely talked about outside matters at home anyway. His mom tended to make a huge fuss over everything, so he usually kept most things to himself.
“And… um… yeah…”
Noah still seemed to have more to say.
“I’m dirty, aren’t I? So… um… I didn’t want anyone to know that I’m this kind of filthy person… so… yeah. That’s why. How should I put it…”
Noah fidgeted with her fingertips,
“I… I hate myself right now.”
She muttered it shortly, her face filled with sorrow.
“Noah.”
Dohyun stopped washing the dishes, quietly peeled off his rubber gloves, and opened both arms toward her.
“Come here.”
“Huh?”
“I said come here and let me hold you. Right here.”
“Ah…”
“Don’t want to?”
“It’s not that. It’s just… yeah.”
Noah knelt down in front of Dohyun.
Only then did her gaze finally settle, precariously, just below Dohyun’s eye level.
Noah looked up at him with eyes glistening with moisture,
“Hold me.”
She leaned forward and buried her head deep into his chest with a soft thud.
Dohyun’s arms and hands gently wrapped around Noah’s head.
“Listen, Noah.”
“Yeah. Dohyun.”
And then,
“You’re not dirty.”
Dohyun repeated softly,
“Not even a little bit.”
Again and again,
“You’re just hurting a little right now. So don’t hate yourself so much.”
He emphasized it firmly.
Her hair, which had grown thicker along with her enlarged body, felt slightly coarse like a wild beast’s mane, tickling between his fingers.
“And you know how surprisingly neat I am, right?”
“...No.”
“In times like this, you’re supposed to just say ‘yes.’”
“Yes.”
In the middle of it all, Noah slipped in a short, deadpan quip.
“Anyway… yeah. I don’t keep anything dirty in the house. I absolutely never bring anything filthy home. Noah, you’re just hurt and sick right now. Got it? It’s just a little scab from being injured. In time, it’ll heal completely clean, and you won’t hurt anymore. Okay?”
Dohyun kept speaking as gently as possible, repeating himself like a promise.
And then,
“Want to see my arm?”
Dohyun released the hug and held his arm out right in front of Noah’s eyes.
“These…”
“They’re the same as yours, right?”
They weren’t as numerous, as large, or as deep as Noah’s, but the cigarette burns and the knife scars from self-harm were the same.
“These are the wounds I got back when that bastard Chae Sumin was bullying me. Some of them I made myself. You remember how you covered for me back then, right?”
“...”
Noah couldn’t answer at first.
“...Yeah…”
She finally replied in a voice that sounded like it was crawling.
“I’ve never once thought these scars were dirty. They’re proud scars I got because you tried to help me. It hurt back then, but it doesn’t hurt at all now. Obviously they’re not dirty either. I’ve never hated myself because of them. So…”
He reached out toward Noah again and pulled her head into his embrace.
“You too. Don’t hate yourself so much just because of scars like these. Can you promise me that?”
“Yeah…”
Inside Dohyun’s arms, the eyes of Noah, who was drinking in the sweet sympathy and pity, were sinking deep with an expression that was neither sadness, nor pain, nor even fear.
Her gaze was heavy, murky, and unfathomably deep — like something ancient and hungry slowly rising from the bottom of a black lake.
“I promise…”
Helping Noah wasn’t going to be easy.
‘There’s no good way…’
Even muttering to himself felt pointless. Even sighing felt pointless. Dohyun simply swallowed it all down inside his heart.
There were institutional methods, but reporting to the police was a prerequisite to receiving any support. Since sexual assault and abuse were handled as criminal cases, even if Noah didn’t want it, the police could start an investigation on their own if they secured any evidence.
“Do I really have to report it? I don’t want to… go to the station, meet the police, tell them everything… and then other people will all know, ugh… and my dad too. What do I do about Dad? What do I…”
But Noah looked like she desperately just wanted to run away from the entire situation.
“I won’t report it. It’s okay. I’ll take care of it somehow.”
What else could he do? If she wanted to run, then at the very least he could run with her. He couldn’t pretend none of it had happened, but he could at least help her escape.
‘What the hell is the law supposed to be protecting, then…’
Beautiful judicial justice, beautiful rule of law, beautiful realization of justice.
None of it could protect Noah.
When someone was gravely ill, they always needed sweet opium.
‘…Magic?’
He considered it for a moment but shook his head vigorously to shake the thought away.
No, that wouldn’t work either.
There were occasionally people who could use powerful enough magic to alter memories or tamper with the mind, but those people only worked with chaebol families.
In most cases, it was just slightly stronger superstition — shamanism, sorcery, fortune telling, voodoo, or psychological counseling.
The methods were vague, the process was vague, and the results were uncertain.
Most of it was what people called scams. Even when it worked, it was basically gambling.
He couldn’t rely on something like that, but…
“Hey, Noah.”
Just in case, Dohyun turned around—
“You scared me.”
“Did I surprise you…?”
“Let’s make some noise when we walk, okay?”
Noah had somehow crept up behind him while he was staring desperately at the computer monitor.
“Do you know anyone who can use magic?”
“Magic?”
Noah tilted her head,
“Don’t get too obsessed with voodoo.”
“...Stop joking around.”
“I’m kidding. I don’t know anyone.”
“Hmm…”
“Besides, I heard most normal magic doesn’t work well on me anyway. Maybe because my body got so big?”
Noah ran her eyes over various parts of her own body,
lingering especially long on her chest.
“…”
Dohyun pinched the bridge of his nose, his face twisting into an exhausted grimace.
‘Now that I think about it, that bastard Chae Sumin’s family…’
He vaguely remembered hearing that they had West African immigrant blood mixed in their lineage and could use voodoo magic for generations.
Chae Sumin, who had suddenly manifested her ah-in traits around the end of middle school and turned into a girl, just like Noah. In the end, she couldn’t adapt to her changed body and had fled overseas to study abroad in a panic.
After that, for some unknown reason, she had kept trying to contact Dohyun. But every single time,
‘Is she going to ask me to keep my mouth shut once she succeeds or something?’
With that thought in mind, he had never responded.
He blocked her calls, her SNS, everything. The letters that somehow found their way to his home address were all torn to shreds.
‘What kind of face does that bastard even have…’
No matter how desperately he needed help, he had no intention of answering her, nor any desire to reach out first.
So that option was ruled out for now.
“Agh… Ah!!”
Feeling suffocated, Dohyun let out a small shout and stretched his arms out wide.
“Are you tired? Should I make you some coffee?”
Noah watched his expression carefully.
“Hm? That’d be nice.”
At Dohyun’s approval, Noah trotted off to the kitchen and put water on to boil.
In the meantime, Dohyun stretched and loosened up his body.
With a click, the kettle button popped up.
She tore open an instant Americano packet with a rip and poured it into the mug.
And then,
“Dohyun.”
“Yeah?”
“Latte? Or Americano?”
For some reason Noah asked with an awkward “hehe” and a shy look on her face.
Dohyun thought for a few seconds.
“Latte.”
He answered without much thought.
The moment the thought ‘Did we even have any milk left at home?’ crossed his mind—
“Hehe…”
The neckline of her already oversized white shirt stretched dramatically, and one of her large breasts swayed heavily as it caught on the fabric.
“Lots of milk? Or just a little?”
“Uh…”
Dohyun hesitated for a moment,
“Lots.”
He answered as casually as he could manage.
Warm white liquid swirled gently into the dark coffee, releasing a faint, sweet scent.
Effect:Noah’s special homemade latte, filled with affection and obsession
Duration:Until the cup is empty
“He… hehe…”
As expected, Noah squeezed one of her breasts and sprayed breast milk straight into the cup.
And then,
“Here, drink up.”
When Dohyun took the coffee, Noah’s eyes sparkled brightly as she studied his reaction.
It was exactly like a child who had drawn a picture of their father and was now waiting for praise.
In that case, he had to respond properly.
Dohyun took a sip of the coffee,
“It’s good.”
He answered with the warmest smile he could manage.
“He… hehe…”
Fortunately, his evaluation seemed to be a passing grade for Noah as well. Her expression melted into a sloppy, bashful grin.
...It actually did taste good, too.
In the end, after two full days of research and agonizing, they decided to handle the most urgent matters first.
Starting with the visible external injuries.
“I’m scared to go outside…”
Because of Noah’s condition, even going to the hospital was impossible. So they decided to use a house-call doctor instead.
Since they couldn’t get any support, they had to pay out of pocket.
Noah looked utterly dejected.
“I’m sorry. You’re spending so much money because of me…”
But Dohyun replied with the joke she had made before.
“Didn’t you say half of it was money you earned anyway?”
“Think of it as you spending your own money.”
As casually as possible.
At that moment, Dohyun felt deeply grateful for how shameless Noah had been back then.
