I Like You
He couldn't let go of Seo Ihwa's hand in the end. With his forehead gently pressed against the side of her bed, he sank deep into sleep.
....
"Ihwa, isn't that girl way too fake?"
"She thinks she can get away with anything because the chairman dotes on her. It's so annoying having to suck up to her."
The women's murmuring voices drifted through the gap in the lavishly decorated door. They were the older sisters and aunts who used to hug her and shower her with affection every single day.
Young Ihwa stood frozen behind the door, her whole body turning to ice as she clenched her fists tight. A vicious sense of betrayal tore through her entire being.
Beep—, beep—.
Her eyes slowly opened amid the mechanical sounds ringing at regular intervals. That dream again. This damned dream that always found her whenever her heart felt uneasy and restless.
When she came to her senses amid the artificial laughter of those women ringing in her ears, she felt a warm presence grasped at her fingertips. Lowering her gaze, there it was again. You. My little traitor.
I pushed you away so harshly and hurt you, yet why are you still holding my hand so tightly and sleeping by my bedside?
As if he had read her inner thoughts, he opened his eyes at once. The moment their gazes met, he poured out his worries with that innocent face of his.
"Are you feeling a bit better? How's your body? Does anything hurt?"
"...I'm fine. I'm just a little low on energy."
She wiped away the cold sweat trickling down her cheek and swallowed the awkward silence. Yet what came flooding in next was an unstoppable sense of relief, and a deep gratitude toward this foolish man.
"Thank you... for rushing over right away."
"I promised, didn't I?"
You always stayed by my side whenever I was sick. No, to be exact, you always moved according to my wishes whenever I asked.
When I first met you at Daehyeop, I thought you were the same as the rest. Just another one of those common hyenas who drooled over my background and outer shell.
But on that day when I collapsed at the company entrance from a terrible cold, all my prejudices shattered. My head was spinning so badly I couldn't even stand.
I lost count of how many times I threw up while trying to work, constantly running to the bathroom. On that day when I was falling apart, the hyenas who usually circled me were only desperate to seize the chance and get me into their cars to take me home.
Those disgusting bastards whose intentions were obvious. But you were different.
Even though I first raised my sharp thorns and harshly drove you away, you quietly bought medicine and stayed by my side. In truth, at that moment I buried my face in my knees and shed secret tears where you couldn't see. It had been so long since I'd received such pure, uncalculating warmth from anyone.
That's when I realized. You were a 'transparent person' whose true nature was clearly visible, unlike all the trash I'd seen my whole life.
Looking back now, I had already started liking you from that rainy day. Even though I didn't yet recognize that this terrible thirst was the feeling of liking someone.
The moment I became certain you were transparent, I proposed a contract relationship to you. A secret offer I could never dare make to anyone else. Knowing you desperately needed money, you resisted once as expected, then appeared before me the very next day.
The way you lowered your head while accepting the contract terms that put me in a difficult position looked so adorable and lovable in my eyes that you'll never know.
And so, using the excuse of a contract relationship as my shield, I began to satisfy my own selfish desires. I told you I started this act because I hated other people's gazes and attention, but that was a lie. It was true that I hated others' interest. But from the moment you entered my sight, I no longer needed anyone else's attention.
For me, it was enough to make just you, Kim Woojin, mine alone.
But cracks began to form in my perfect fortress. The cigarette smoke that faintly clung to your body. I tried hard to dismiss it, telling myself it couldn't be, but the moment both Employee Yu and Assistant Manager Choi testified on the same day that you had been smoking, the suspicion buried deep in my heart swelled beyond control.
I tested you in the most miserable way possible, and you fell into my trap as easily as a mouse. So you were just another ordinary human after all. I didn't need anything else; having you was enough.
An intense sense of betrayal and rage unlike anything I'd felt in my life made my blood boil. That day, I poured out every ugly emotion surging inside me onto you without any filter. And I resolved to give you up. Because you too were fake, hidden behind a mask.
But you have no idea how desperately I cried after returning home from casting you aside without mercy. For days I couldn't swallow a single spoonful of rice, like someone with anorexia. I didn't want to see you again or hear your voice, yet this damned emotion carving up my chest showed no sign of disappearing.
Then one day while I lived like a wreck, a spine-chilling sensation began that someone was deliberately following me. A black shadow lingering just within earshot, not openly harming but hovering close enough for me to feel their breath.
At first I thought it might be a watcher sent by my father, but I knew better than anyone that cold-blooded man would never play such a feeble prank on me. The pressure from this unknown presence made it hard to breathe and pushed my stress to the limit.
What did they want to do to me? Who the hell was tightening the noose around my neck?
On that commute home when I was mentally exhausted and reaching my breaking point, you appeared before my eyes like a miracle. The moment I saw you, I lost all reason, ran to you, and burst into tears.
Knowing it was selfish and ugly, I still held the blind conviction that even if the whole world was fake, you, Kim Woojin, would understand me in the end. Fortunately you opened your heart to my tears once more, and swallowing my misery I threw you another trap.
"Instead... come right away when I'm really scared. I'll give you as much money as you want."
Because if I gave you money, you couldn't refuse. Having grown up learning only how to make transactions like this, I instinctively knew you would helplessly come running at my call again.
And unlike other days, this stalker began pursuing me. I immediately called the first person who came to mind—you, not the police or my parents. Even in this life-threatening situation, you were the only one I could think of.
It was then, standing at the edge of a cliff, that I realized I liked you. And while running through the alley I bumped into someone. Kim Woojin. It was you.
The moment my legs gave out I hugged you tight. Because only then did I feel like I could survive.
And now. You held my hand and stayed by my side.
It's lovable. I wish you'd act like a dog that only waits for me, like I'm the only person in your world.
At that time you tried to leave me and get up. The feeling that something inside me had snapped made me unconsciously grab your collar. The terrible fear of being left alone again, and the sensation of being completely abandoned, crashed over me.
But there was no justification or reason for someone as calculating as me to hold onto you. In the end, to make you sit down by my side in this place, I had no choice but to confess the feelings I had hidden deep in my chest.
At that moment, Woojin's face flushed violently. It was the night he sat facing another person, desperately trampling on his lingering attachment to her in order to erase Ihwa completely. From the person he had struggled with all his might to forget, he ended up hearing the very confession he had wanted most.
Yet even with that desperate confession, a corner of Woojin's heart remained heavy. As long as the hidden secret blocked the way, this relationship could clearly shake again at any time.
"Then please answer just one thing honestly. What exactly is your family?"
At Woojin's direct strike, Ihwa seemed flustered and slowly released his collar. She remained in heavy silence for a long while.
"...Is there some reason you can't tell me?"
"...Yes."
His chest felt suffocatingly tight with frustration. Woojin roughly swept his bangs back and let out a deep sigh.
"I'll take a call and be right back. I need to organize my thoughts too."
Woojin turned and left the hospital room. He had clearly received a confession from the person he liked, yet instead of joy his heart felt so uneasy and complicated he thought he might go crazy.
When he reached the hospital lobby and turned on his phone, another practical problem crushed him.
Ah... what about Semin.
To begin with Ihwa, he first needed to clearly settle things with Semin. If he didn't take Ihwa's hand, how should he continue his relationship with Semin? His head throbbed from the tangled threads, but he soon firmed his resolve and called her.
—Hello?
In a low, sunken voice, Woojin carefully explained the situation: his colleague from the same intake was being stalked, so he had no choice but to rush over to help.
—That's a relief. Is she safe?
"Yeah..."
—Good. I'm really glad.
"Lee Semin."
—...Woojin, I think it would be better for us to stay good friends. Don't you agree?
Semin calmly cut in first with the parting words Woojin had been about to say. Perceptive as she was, she must have already read everything from his eyes when he burst out of the movie theater.
Overcome with guilt and remorse, Woojin couldn't easily speak.
"Ha... I'm sorry. I really didn't start this with a light heart."
—I know. That's why thank you for being honest with me.
Every time Semin said thank you, it felt like thorns were piercing Woojin's heart.
"Don't thank me. I'm the one who should be grateful... for understanding."
A short, soft laugh came from the other end of the line.
—Okay. If you're sorry, buy me a drink next time. I'll drink until your wallet is completely ruined that day.
"Alright. You pick the date."
Click.
After ending the call, Woojin slumped onto a bench in front of the hospital. Remorse and guilt toward Semin washed over him, and he kept his head bowed for a long time. Then he made a bitter resolution.
"Ha... I'm never doing blind dates again."
At that moment dark clouds gathered, and as if on cue, rain began to fall in heavy drops. Gazing at the sky turning gray, Woojin muttered dejectedly.
"It rains every time I get tangled up with Seo Ihwa..."
After staring blankly at the falling rain and organizing his thoughts, Woojin finally turned his steps back toward the hospital room. When he opened the door and entered, Seo Ihwa, sitting on the bed, frowned and glared at him.
"Why are you so late?"
"Ah... the call took a little longer than expected."
"Who was it?"
At her interrogating tone, Woojin flinched. But he had resolved not to lie to her anymore, so he confessed everything without hiding it. It was the person from the blind date, and he had just ended things over the phone.
Upon hearing the full story, Seo Ihwa's eyes widened instantly before a sharp cry burst out.
"What?! A blind date?! Have you lost your mind?!"
"No, why are you calling me crazy when I went on a blind date..."
At Woojin's reply, Seo Ihwa whipped her head away and bit her lip. In a voice too small for him to hear, she muttered ominously.
"I've handled things to some extent on the company side, but I didn't expect a blind date outside... This won't do."
"Sorry? What did you just say?"
"Nothing! So? Did you bring an answer to my confession?"
Woojin jiggled his leg as he voiced his final remaining worry.
"By any chance... when can you tell me about that family matter?"
"When the time comes. It won't be long."
"Ha... You're sure there's really no problem, right?"
At Woojin's words, Seo Ihwa instinctively sensed that he had finally decided to stand by her side. She smiled brightly like a child, tightly gripping his hand and nodding repeatedly.
"Yes! There's really no problem. Even if one appears, I'll make sure it doesn't exist."
At that answer—confident to the point of arrogance—Woojin finally let out a small chuckle. He wrapped his fingers around her slender ones that clutched his hand and spoke softly.