The Real Game Starts After the Stream Ends
Game's over, and I was about to end the stream, but the post-game chat kicked off. This is basically the real game. I've done it before back in the day. It's just casual chit-chat... you know, bonding. Who did well, who messed up, what was cool... and what to do next... It doesn't drag on too long, maybe 10 or 20 minutes. Of course, if someone's got a schedule, they dip early. Sometimes, if you're lucky, you snag another collab slot out of it.
I just sat there quietly listening to Moteok and Raming.
"Nah, today was fine. Everyone did great. Sometimes you just can't loot it all. We'll crush it next time."
"Next time?"
"Yeah. Next time. We can just do it again."
"Hmm... Let's make it four players then."
"Why? Scared?"
"Yeah."
Eh? Does that mean I can join again? I was holding my breath, eavesdropping hard.
"Why scared? We can do it."
"We can, but... wall vibes."
"Ban, huh..." Just a difference in perspective. I thought I did great. As supply duty, I pushed through without a hitch. Picked up everything we needed. Gave whatever they asked for. But... what they're talking about is shooting. Yeah, right. I couldn't shoot for shit. Basically just carried it for show. I admit it. Gotta own what I own.
"Why? Who's trash-talking Jjang Bro?"
"Huh...? No! Not at all."
"Jjang Bro did great. Ban all the haters~"
"No, I did great but chat says I sucked."
"Huh? What? How can you do great and suck?"
I could explain for an hour straight. But... long talk means admitting I suck. Short and sweet shows confidence and proves I rocked it.
"Supply. Gun."
"Pardon? Supply? Gun?"
"Did good. Did bad."
"Ah, hahaha. Good at supply, bad at shooting? That it?"
"Yes. Spot on."
"Exactly. Right?"
Hic... hic... hic. I hear hiccups. Holding them back? Chug water to kill 'em quick. Hmm... she'll handle it.
"Sena? It's fine. Ignore the haters."
"Yeah! Obviously."
"No, why so cheery. Anyway, fun times today. I'm out."
"Bye."
"See ya!"
"Catch you next time~"
Raming logged off, leaving just me and Moteok. I wanted to dip too. Stream ran long, I'm beat. But.
"No, Jjang Bro. Let's do it again next time. When you free?"
"I... uh."
"Next time too. Let's do it~"
"Sure."
"When then? Oh, right. Yeah. Saw your Zomboid... you were crushing it?"
"Yes! I'm good at it. Found my calling. Ehehe. Ehehe."
Hope the collab day comes soon. I'll show off my badass side big time. Ehehe. Like, zombie wave hits—bang bang, pow pow... DaSena. Sena's a beast. Thinking about the praise has me grinning nonstop.
"Just trust me. I'll pow-pow... and protect you from zombies!"
"Whoa~ For real? I trust you."
"Yes! Trust me. I'm really good."
I'll prove it. Wait and see.
"Got it. See you then. I'm out too."
"Yep! Log off safe."
Me too, end stream...
"Me too..."
"Yeah... you all get it. I'm out too."
Chat's got eagle eyes. Already a tear flood. Back in the day, pity kept me going extra 10-20 mins. But now? Different. Streaming toughened me up. Stick to my pace. That's how you stream tomorrow too. Stretch today for "fun" and you crash. I ended cool and casual.
Post-stream, shower and out—got a message.
Hit me like a truck. Wait, no... aren't we friends? Was it... just me again? Me solo delusion? Clueless again? Did I miss the cue? Raming... Raming drew a hard line... No, no... Was I the only one serious again?
Sudden gloom. Old memories flood back. I thought we were real friends, acted close... but she said, We're not that close. Stop messaging. Sniff sniff... Could've been friends. Hands shaking, I typed.
Bracing for worst, delusions spiral. 'We're not friends. Why act like it?' Then what? Can't help it. Yeah, never were. Fine. Used to it. Yeah. My delusion. But... but... I thought we were friends! Why confuse me? Gonna hate you for real...!
10 mins, no reply.
"Asleep...?" Confuse me then crash? Fine. Shut down PC, crawl under covers. Electric blanket on, eyes shut.
"Me sleep too..."
1 AM, lights out.
＊＊＊
Raming had hustled three years straight. Tried no-cam, cam, reincarnated as VTuber twice—all flops. Then luck hit: landed at a VTuber-exclusive MCN agency, life reversed. Six months blew past three years' total earnings. After? Money beyond dreams. Not just cash—streaming skills leveled up. Minor flubs? Breeze past. Chat skills, donos, YouTube trends... all pro-level now, she brags.
But one thing still doesn't stick. Frontstage: friends, crew. Backstage: polite honorifics. On-stream: fake close even if not. Same team. Viewers love it. They catch vibes better than streamers. Can't show personal beef on air. Means hater fuel and drama bait. Raming learned hard. As Donggeuraming? Nah, pre-VTuber Hakko A days. Still stings.
Can't be tight with everyone. Obvious. Some teammates just... business. Knows it best. Still, on-stream: fake besties. Great chem? Super close? End stream...
'Good work.'
'Tough one.'
'See ya~'
Too business for BFFs. Then silence till next content pitch. No chit-chat... none. Zero interest. But on-stream? Like we know everything. Gotta. For the stream. Always smiling mask.
Hits fatigue hard. Reality crashes in. Checked group chat first. Crew room? Empty as ever. Used to have some life. Now ghost town. Editors, thumbnailers, managers... work stuff piles up. One real friend chat: old school buddy. Real-life pal saves the boredom. But rhythms clash. Can't geek on streaming—they don't get it. Meetups? Schedules suck.
Her message: When meet?
"Hmm... this week no... next? Then?"
Types habit. Lies back... boots PC. Discord auto-launches.
"What?"
Four from SeonSeonSeon-ah.
It's 4 AM for her. Waiting no reply. Now 2 PM here. Raming clapped hand over mouth. Stared at screen, then replied.
"Weird one."
Instant reply.
"Cute."