Parliament Dissolved
Everyone has something they’re good at. Unfortunately, I have zero talent for management.
“I’ll handle the organizing. Secretary-General, take notes carefully.”
“Ah, yes! Ehehe. Your Majesty~ I’ll write it all down.”
“Majesty? Hehe. Ahem. Hmm… What does it take to have public authority?”
“Huh…? You want me to write that down, Your Majesty?”
“Yes. Write it down.”
I opened my mouth slowly. “Public authority… Master Sun Tzu from The Art of War once said—”
“Yes, yes. Is it really Sun Tzu from The Art of War? Isn’t it Jiang Taigong? Your Majesty?”
“Oh, I was just testing you. What an incredibly competent staff!”
I turned my head sharply. It’s fine. Being a little short on knowledge isn’t embarrassing. I can just learn!
But then…
- Both of them are pissed
- It’s Sun Wu, not Jiang Taigong
- Sun Tzu is better lol
- This is a double roast
- This is virtual behavior~
- The day Sena wins is coming whoa;;
“M-Master Maem…”
“Khh… Yes. I saw it too… I’m sorry.”
“Still, I matched two characters and the word ‘Sun.’”
“That… isn’t really something to brag about… Pffhehe…”
“Anyway. In Master Sun Tzu’s The Art of War, it says this. Write it down properly.”
It’s one of my favorite quotes. I don’t actually know if it’s real. I just saw it somewhere and liked it, so I’ve remembered it ever since.
“Lower yourself to make the enemy arrogant.”
“Uh… I wrote it down for now…”
“I’ll explain. Let me give you the full root story.”
I was about to tell a very long root story I’d been fantasizing about since forever. One I’d never told anyone… the kind that only existed in my head. I’d adapt it to the current situation.
They say the position makes the person. It’s important to tailor the story to the right place and time. Right. I’m the guild master who has everything. Practically the Pope. The King. I hold immense power!! I was just acknowledged for it, wasn’t I?
“Ah! Before that. I’m the King, right?”
“Of course. You’re the guild master, so you’re the King.”
“Hmm, in that case, add Pope as well. This is a cathedral, after all.”
In the Middle Ages, did the Pope also act as King? Ah, I should’ve read Faraway Neighbor Country more carefully. Aww. I only watched the England episodes, so I don’t know. This is a fusion Middle Ages. I’m both Pope and King and guild master. Yeah, I’ve been crowned.
“Anyway, let me explain. I’m going to look incompetent. So other guilds will think, ‘That guild master is useless…’ That’s the image we want. And then… you know what comes next, right?”
Whew, thank goodness. I said it without trembling, confidently and coolly.
“Uh… So what’s the benefit?”
“The benefit? The other side will let their guard down. They’ll think, ‘No need to worry about that place!!’ Yeah. Make them think there’s nothing to worry about.”
“Oh… Really…?”
“Yes. So I’ll live a dissolute and incompetent life. But because I’m a hidden powerhouse, I’ll still hold all the power. Instead, the Secretary-General will handle all guild operations.”
“Eing?”
“If it’s too much, tell Raming or Tteok-nim to do it. I don’t know anything. Problem solved, right? Construction? Ask Minister of Construction Joseph from now on. Guild schedules, Maem-nim, you handle them yourself. If you need money, create a Minister of Finance and give it to them. Ah, but I’m King-level. Pope-level. My authority is absolute.”
“Pffhehe. You’re just dumping work, aren’t you?”
She hit the nail on the head. If I put it badly, it really was work dumping. But if I phrase it nicely, it sounds good, right?
“Don’t say it negatively. Say it positively… positively. We’re just delegating tasks to competent ministers. How about that?”
“G-good… right?”
“Yes! Of course. Secretary-General… promotion. Effective today. Minister of the Executive Branch. Perfect. I’ll go offer a prayer. No, wait. Make it Prime Minister. Be the Prime Minister. Uh… and also be the Chief Justice. Ah, is there anything else you want? I’ll give it all to you. Ah, and the Inspector General too. That ‘thank you’ isn’t it… Maem-nim might not know, so… ehehe. It means supervising and inspecting.”
Maem-nim has less knowledge than me. That’s what the viewers judged. Her wisdom might be high, but her knowledge is lower than mine.
“No, I… got it~ I know.”
“Thank goodness! So, Prime Minister, Chief Justice, and Auditor General. Are you satisfied?”
“It’s not about satisfaction…”
“Ah, you want more?”
Maem-nim… has a surprisingly strong desire for honor? Well, if someone like that exists, it’s convenient for me.
“No, I… No. You’re so unreasonable I have nothing to say.”
“Are you satisfied?”
“Puhaha. You really have your own distinct worldview… We can’t communicate. It’s like talking to a wall.”
“I’m the Pope and the King and the guild master!!”
“Even so, you should listen to your subordinates!!”
“Ah, I see.”
Our family has always had incredibly strong stubbornness. Everyone’s bull-headed. There’s no way to break it. You have to crush it with power. There are times when I don’t yield to power either. Every time that happens, Mom threatens to cut my allowance by 90%. The moment she says that, my stubbornness breaks instantly.
I have to buy the 30-day package tomorrow, and she’s saying she won’t give me allowance? That’s a disaster. That’s the only way to yield to power… Actually, I once tried to stand my ground and said “Don’t give it to me!!” and she really didn’t. I was so upset. I only meant “don’t say you’ll give it and then not give it”… but Mom actually didn’t give it.
Anyway. Right now, I have the most power. I have everything. I’m the King and Pope-level guild master.
“Anyway, I’ll be counting on you. Prime Minister, Chief Justice, and Auditor General. From now on, I’m King-and-Pope-and-Guild-Master.”
- The country’s doomed lol
- That recognition craving is insane
- Crazy Recognition Craving King lololol
- Aww lololol
- Insane whoa
“Understood for now. King-and-Pope-and-Guild-Master-nim. You really don’t hold back. You want all the good stuff, huh. Hehehihi.”
After wandering the world for three or four hours, I received a whisper.
“Come to the cathedral right now!!”
“What’s going on? Does anyone know? Ah… if they know, they’ll get banned for being a cuckoo…”
- Kick the cuckoo out
- Really creative psychological warfare
- whoa;;
- Scary.
- The logic is trash
There’s no way the viewers would know. I gave up on monster hunting and immediately returned to the cathedral.
When I arrived, the founding contributors were gathered.
“What? Raming… Joseph-ssi. It’s been a while.”
They were truly welcome faces.
“Everyone’s here. Tteok said she’d be here soon, so we can talk now.”
“What? What are we talking about?”
“How we’re going to run the guild. We need to discuss it. You know this extension is happening, right? We have about three weeks left. Whether we keep going or not… we need to talk about all of that.”
“Ah… Wait… Did you all talk without me?”
“We pretty much decided everything.”
“Wait, what? Without me?”
“Yeah. Anyway, Sena. Never mind.”
I was in shock. I’m the King. Why are they talking without me? I’m basically the law, aren’t I? Major decisions should be discussed together!!
Yeah. I could endure this.
“It ran fine even without Sena-nim. Why are you butting in now?”
“Pffhihihi. No, it was all according to the guild master’s will.”
“But I have no idea what you’re doing. Sena, what have you been up to?”
“She’s probably been playing around.”
“Just keep playing. We’ll take care of everything.”
I couldn’t endure this humiliation. The parliament was mocking the King. This was very serious.
I reminded everyone of my status once more.
“Wait… Wasn’t I the King-and-Pope-and-Guild-Master? Maem-nim?”
“That’s right!! That’s right!! Everyone knows Sena-nim is the King-and-Pope-and-Guild-Master. I’ve been promoting it hard too.”
“Then why… me. Why is it the parliament instead of royal authority? I’ve read the England episodes of Faraway Neighbor Country thirty times, so I know. This is the parliament being so powerful that they set up the King as a puppet and do whatever they want with him.”
Only laughter could be heard in response to my words. Now they were even mocking the King? Then I had no choice.
“I’m the King-and-Pope-and-Guild-Master… and the ministers are conspiring… laughing at me… The power structure is messed up. The hierarchy is all wrong. I am a powerful King!!”
I pulled out my hammer. And started with Raming… In front of power, there is no blood or tears. Power even kills family. If you look at Joseon history… I know it well from reading the Annals of the Joseon Dynasty manhwa illustrations twelve times. It happens a lot. They killed everyone.
Or, in a cooler expression—dissolved the parliament. Yes. I dissolved the conspiring parliament.
“Parliament dissolved!! Secret meetings without me are forbidden. I’m the King.”
- She’s gone full dictator lol
- She snapped whoa
- Kill Sena
- She went completely insane
- whoa
- Nice
- What are you doing?
- She’s got no sense at all
- What did she do?
The chat was full of people who deserved to be purged. They didn’t understand my deep intentions. I was already upset that they held a meeting without me. And now they’re challenging the King’s authority? I can’t tolerate that.
“I did it to elevate my authority. Do you have a problem? Power is originally cruel. Parliament. Parliament dissolved!! Dissolved!! Reconvened!!”
I declared it boldly to 3,200 viewers including lurkers. But why are there so many viewers all of a sudden? I didn’t expect this. I got way too into it in front of so many people. Now that I think about it… I think I made a mistake? Hehehe.
Master Maem was flustered. She suddenly got killed, so she wondered what was going on. When she checked the chat, she saw a few angry viewers.
- Just quit and go somewhere else
- Abandon her
- Just abandon her
- Can’t communicate, abandon her
“Everyone, whoa~ whoa~ Don’t get angry.”
Maem spent five minutes calming the chat down. Soothing an angry chat wasn’t easy.
“There must be a reason. Everyone~ whoa~ whoa. The temperature’s way too high right now. Let’s cool down a bit. Everyone~”
- lololol
- Aww, this is annoying
While she kept trying to calm them, the desire to keep calming them suddenly disappeared.
“No, but… Aww, this is annoying… The person who said that has the nickname ‘Daegu Mayor Yoo Seon-a’… it’s Sena. The one who said ‘abandon her’ is ‘Leftist Feminist Yoo Seon-a-nim’… If you’re going to wear a mask… at least…”
- Run!!
- Run away!!
- lolololol
- For real
- This is hilarious
- The nicknames are apocalyptic
- Don’t those get banned?
“Right… Aww. They’re trolls wearing masks. I’m heading out for now.”
Even though the viewers were angry, Maem had no intention of going anywhere else. Among all guilds, Maru Church was the most comfortable. If she went somewhere else, the viewers would all scatter. Other guilds were full of people who took everything too seriously and grinded nonstop. If anyone was caught slacking, they’d even get reported to the complaints board. Both streamers and viewers were extremely intense about immersion.
Maru Church was one of the guilds where you could play games comfortably while drawing moderately. Knowing that, many streamers… especially small ones, joined. Maru Church was also a subtle opportunity for small streamers. There was the large-corporation level Marumotddeok and Donggeuraming, plus the 600,000-subscriber construction slave Kim-ssi (Joseph), so it was a good choice.
There were many advantages, but the best one was the sense of belonging. Doing things alone is boring and lonely. Unless you’re lucky enough to form a crew, there’s nothing to show on stream, and even if you try, all you can do is hit-and-run content.
Maem headed back to the cathedral. The closer she got, the louder Sena’s voice became.
Sena spoke very loudly. “Ah. Then I’ll give Joseph-ssi the Food Department as well. While doing construction, you might have to remove wheat fields, so control food while doing construction. So Joseph-ssi will be Minister of Construction and Minister of Food.”
“Thank you…!! I am grateful for your grace.”
“It would’ve been nice if you’d asked for permission from the start!! Huh! From now on, the parliament will cooperate with the King!! Raming, got it? Joseph-ssi, got it?”
“Yes… That’s right. You’re amazing, Your Imperial Majesty.”
“Great!! Joseph-ssi, wait a second…”
The sound of furious keyboard typing reached Maem’s ears.
“Joseph-ssi. I’ll give you Chief Justice too. So… to summarize, Joseph-ssi is now Minister of Construction, Minister of Food, and Chief Justice. Raming is Minister of Health and Minister of Foreign Affairs… Joseph-ssi, ah. Wait, sorry. Let’s start over. Let’s write it down again.”
“Just tell me.”
“I looked it up on the government Namuwiki, and I want you to also serve as Minister of Employment and Labor, Minister of Land, Infrastructure and Transport, and Minister of Environment. How about the Ministry of National Defense?”
“Isn’t that too many…?”
“Then I’ll reduce it a bit. Again… Minister of Construction and Minister of Food-Employment-Land-Environment. I’ll give you the Ministry of National Defense when Maem-nim arrives.”
“Understood. Thank you. Do I have to keep all of this for life?”
“No. If you find a suitable person later, let me know. I’ll take one of yours and give it to them.”
“Hahaha. Understood.”
By the time Maem arrived, the situation had already ended. Sena spotted her and spoke in a bright voice.
“Maem-nim. I’ve assigned roles. Everyone has agreed to revere me as the combined Pope and Emperor. They’ve also agreed to the Divine Right of Kings. In simple root-story terms, I dissolved the parliament like some king in history, but the parliament reflected on it and I reconvened it. Now we’re friends again!! Did you understand the root story?”