The Strange Streamer and Her Viewers (2)
I figured I’d probably end the stream after this. Today had been a good day. Really good. I got to actually talk to viewers I’d only ever seen in chat… It was fun. Genuinely fun.
“Pshung!!!”
“Bang bang!! Shuuuuing. Puuuuh. Bang!”
What I was doing right now… was actually meaningful. But the viewers didn’t get it. Instead, they decided I was just weird.
Why didn’t they notice? This was clearly a gacha animation. I was literally unboxing a viewer’s pull… a 5-star at 0.012% odds. How could they not tell? I felt a little hurt. It was my favorite game. We’d even played it together on stream before.
“No, no, everyone, this was… a gacha animation. You guys… ugh. You really didn’t know.”
They didn’t know? What a bunch of idiots. If you’re my viewer, you should obviously know this!! Ah! No, wait. If I looked on the bright side, it just meant a lot of new viewers had come in. They didn’t know because they were new…! Always think positive. It’s better for the brain. I just have to calmly explain it!! Yeah. That’s right.
“Listen carefully. You didn’t know because there are so many new viewers. This is from my favorite game. And the Jjang-i, Jjang-a you keep mentioning? They all come from here. Listen up.”
I took a deep breath.
“Puuuushung!!!!! Bang! Ttuk-ttiddi-diddi-dik. Piiiiiing! Waaaaah. 3-star. Get it now?”
“I’ll show you the 4-star animation too. Puuuuh… ping. Waaaaah. Up to that point it’s the same. After that, if you hear shuuuuing, it’s a 4-star. And if you hear a ‘tung-tung’ followed by shuuuuing, that’s a 5-star. Got it?”
Whew. The new viewers learned well, right? I’ll have to teach any future newcomers too~
“From now on I’ll do gacha animations. If I mess up, you get a 1-star. If I nail it, up to 5-star… I’ll give you the reward after we’re done.”
“What are you giving us? Good question. No 1-stars or 2-stars. 3-star is gum. 4-star is a hamburger. 5-star is a hamburger large plus pizza.”
I don’t usually give stuff out… but if it looked like I was just bossing people around for free, it might feel off. Still, I’d already made the promise, so there was no helping it.
“Next… waiting.”
I chugged some water and cleared my throat.
“Ping! Pababa-baba-baba. Bang! Next viewer is…?!
“Hello.”
“Hi~ Hello there.”
“Before I ask my question, can I ask you one thing?”
“What is it?”
“Shouldn’t you start with the puuushung sound?”
“Ah… it changes every time. I can’t remember it exactly the same way.”
I said it confidently. It could vary depending on the situation. If they nitpicked every little detail… that would be troublesome. But the viewer let it slide gently.
“Ah. Yep.”
A very wholesome viewer.
“So… what is it? Who are you?”
“I’m… a high school student. I’ll be a senior this year.”
“A senior?! That’s rarer than wild ginseng…!!”
“…”
“Ah… you’re not a girl. Never mind.”
“You say things that could get you arrested so casually.”
What? What did I do wrong? If I had time, I would’ve argued. Where exactly was I wrong? I was just joking. I didn’t mean anything bad. If you’re upset, you should’ve been born a girl!!
But instead…
“Hmm… I’ve got nothing to say.”
I’d grown. I really had. I held it in well. For the sake of the stream, I had to set aside personal feelings. Yeah, this was the right call. I wasn’t a small-time streamer anymore. I had to grow into a mid-sized one. Good job, me. I praised myself generously.
“Yes… anyway, I had something I wanted to ask.”
“Oh. Sure. You’re a senior, right? Just call me noona. I’ll speak casually too, okay, little bro~”
“Yes… Noona, you do VRChat, right?”
“VRChat? I don’t do that much. Have you seen it?”
“Yes, I saw Jjang-hyung. It’s just… my girlfriend…”
“Hold up!”
Girlfriend? I must’ve misheard.
“Noona’s ears are doubting themselves. Don’t lie to noona. Bad little brother. That’s it.”
“What do you mean?”
“The girlfriend thing. Want to get scolded? Noona’s really gonna get mad. I’m scary when I threaten people.”
“Why? It’s possible.”
“How does someone who likes VTubers even have a girlfriend? Right now… seriously.”
“… Lately I watch a lot of VTubers.”
Look at this guy? Trying to appeal by saying he watches them himself? Did he think noona would fall for that lie?
“Who? I’ve never seen it.”
“Noona, you’re not a high schooler.”
“I see.”
Too logical. I had nothing to say. He was right. I wasn’t a high schooler.
“Fine. I’ll listen on the assumption that I believe you. Keep going.”
“My girlfriend watched that Jjang-hyung.”
“Uh… Koja?”
“Yes… then it’s Koja, not Geunja, right?”
“You haven’t watched VRChat, have you?”
“Huh? I have watched it.”
Liar. If he had, he’d know. That “woman”… wasn’t actually a woman. And there’s no rule saying a girlfriend has to be female. He knew that. Why was he acting like this? It was suspicious, wasn’t it? Right?
“That woman who appeared in the VRChat…”
“Ah~ that one.”
“Hey, that’s enough.”
Can’t use bad terms. I could get banned. Let’s only use proper terminology. Us.
“Ah… yes, the same-sex person.”
“Right. That person… is someone who’s working hard for their boyfriend. It could be something like that.”
“You’re way too soaked in VRChat. Anyway… so my girlfriend. She asked if that was scripted. So I got curious too.”
“Scripted? I don’t know.”
“Ah… so it was a real meeting?”
“Yeah. It was someone I’d never met before.”
“Then you haven’t met that same-sex person since?”
“Nope. Haven’t.”
“Aha… thank you.”
What? That was too easy. According to my logic, I was allowed to be rude and confident with this little-brother viewer. Why? Because I’m the noona. If he didn’t like it, he should’ve been born earlier.
“Nothing else? Nothing else you’re curious about from noona?”
“No… ah! Noona.”
“Yeah, tell me.”
“You’re not changing your virtual model?”
“Ah~ the flat one?”
“Flat one… yes.”
Pyeongjipja would change it when she had time. She was really busy right now, so I hadn’t asked yet. She was already struggling with editing… asking for this on top would be too much. I felt bad.
“You want me to change it?”
“It’d be nice if you did. It looks too shabby right now.”
“Ah… really? Then, little bro. I’ll change it before you’re discharged. Promise.”
“… Yep. Thank you for your hard work.”
“Sure.”
Such a polite little brother. Somehow… my image of viewers was cracking a little. Had I been too extreme? Had I only seen viewers in a bad light? Should I reflect on that? Everyone I’d met so far had been nice. Gentle, good at talking… Hmm… I really didn’t know.
“I’ll take the next one. Hello?”
“Hello? I’m a beggar.”
“Pfft.”
What? It caught me off guard and made me laugh stupidly.
“What? Hamburger?”
“I prepared a script… Can I read it? I put my heart into it.”
“Oh… go ahead.”
Preparation: pass. If it was funny, I’d give him a large hamburger. Let’s see.
“Chairwoman… thank you for working day and night to watch the stream. The thing is… I’m a new viewer and an ad popped up, so I’m devastated. Could you possibly give me just one subscription ticket? Thank you very much.”
“Huh…? What?”
He wasn’t asking for a hamburger? What was this? Suddenly a subscription ticket? It was so random that I instinctively looked at the chat…
“What… what?! You guys, what is this? What the hell?”
The viewers were all copying and pasting that message in perfect sync, spamming it everywhere. What were those emotes? What was going on? What was this?
“No… this is embarrassing… sir.”
“Chairwoman… if you don’t have one, even the vice-chairwoman… please. I’m devastated because of the ads.”
“No, just buy one.”
“I… I… could install an extreme (adblock) thing. Please, even the ancient Jjang-i hyungs… every time an ad plays, the world gets depressing.”
“Sir. Weren’t you here for a hamburger?”
“Huh? I eat four solid meals a day though?”
What! This shamelessness… People eat three meals a day. If you eat four, skip one and use that money to subscribe. This was ridiculous!!
“No! Seriously, sir.”
“Yes.”
“What’s your nickname?”
“…”
“Say it.”
“…”
“Quickly.”
I found out the nickname of the viewer begging for a subscription ticket. Just to check if he was serious or not. I wasn’t going to ban him. I don’t ban people over stuff like this. Shock… he really didn’t have a subscription ticket. The moment his nickname was revealed, an anonymous donor gifted him one. I was stunned. No… they actually gave it to him? Why?
“No… you’re really giving it?”
“What? You should’ve never subscribed? No, you did great. That’s amazing. Straighten your shoulders. You’re a proud angel. You.”
I spent five minutes cheering on the viewers who had subscribed with their own money, then went back to taking viewer calls. There really were some unbelievably unique viewers out there… What else would show up? Since everything had ended nicely, I was looking forward to it again. What kind of viewer would it be this time? Ehehe.
“Here we go? Oh. What’s today’s viewer like!! V-viewer!! Doodoo-doodoo-doo-dung!”
“Seon-a. Let’s play ranked.”
“If you say ‘let’s play ranked’… ranked viewer. Ranked viewers’ special trait is they don’t chat. They recommend and don’t watch. Next.”
I ended the call and looked for another viewer. I’d just randomly thought of the parody, but I got lucky.
Since everyone was enjoying it, my energy kept rising. Hehe. I had to work hard, right?
“Ehehe. Next one, what, what will it be?!”