Honey Water Balloon (6)
'Thank goodness the red potion buff on Xuzhou hasn't worn off yet.' The next morning, after barely catching some shut-eye, a commotion drew my eyes to beyond the walls, and I breathed a sigh of relief.
For now, Sun Jian's forces and Yuan Shu's army were holding position, having formed a siege line. Not knowing our strength inside Xuzhou, they weren't daring to launch a reckless assault.
If they'd brought siege weapons like battering rams or cloud ladders, we'd have been done for—but luckily, they hadn't. From the looks of it, they'd rushed here in a hurry too.
'If Sun Jian had come with full commitment, Xuzhou would've fallen already.' Sun Jian got screwed over in all sorts of ways, but his military talent was the real deal.
His shortsightedness—doing Yuan Shu's dirty work as an assassin for hire and losing public favor, then coveting the imperial seal and blowing everything—sucked, but when it came to battle, he was a true hero.
He was the one who hard-carried the anti-Dong Zhuo coalition, regardless of historical records or Romance of the Three Kingdoms. It was Sun Jian who scaled the walls of Hulao Pass through sheer grit and opened the high road to Luoyang. Even Dong Zhuo was spooked enough to propose a marriage alliance.
In the game, Sun Jian had siege bonuses too. Smashing Xuzhou while Liu Bei was still rebuilding would've been a cakewalk for him.
'He's just being cautious, that's all.' Fortunately, we'd racked up some serious merits in the joint op with Sun Jian before. Thanks to that, he was overestimating our forces.
Right now, Xuzhou was like a VTuber whose red buff hadn't faded yet—Xuzhou-chan in full glory. Sun Jian didn't know our true state, so he was hesitating. That was it, nothing more, nothing less.
"They're afraid of us." Liu Bei scanned the room, his voice calm and steady. Even in a fucked situation, that unflappable tone was his strength.
"If we rush a siege prep and they spot our weaknesses, it'll be trouble. Once they realize our numbers are thin, they'll hit us with everything they've got," Liu Bei said.
"The best move is for someone to lead a vanguard and break their momentum," I suggested.
"Mm. Just as Kim Gong says. It's risky, but... anyone volunteer?" Liu Bei looked around.
"I'll go." Guan Yu stepped forward.
"Oh, Yun Chang." Liu Bei gazed at her with trust.
"..." Guan Yu looked a bit anxious, her eyes flicking toward Zhao Yun.
'Ace showdown, huh.' She hated how a powerhouse like Zhao Yun was stealing her big-sis spot in Liu Bei's favor. Someone as prideful as Guan Yu was sensitive about that.
"Haha. Wrong answer, though." Liu Bei shook his head with a smile.
"Isn't it time we all in the Liu Bei Army steeled our resolve together?" Suddenly, Liu Bei drew his longsword.
"Brothers and sisters of the anti-Dong Zhuo fight—and our new little sister Zhao Yun! Let's all charge out and tear those bastards apart!!!" Liu Bei bellowed fiercely, raising his sword high.
'Itching for a fight after so long, huh.' She'd been weirdly pumped during sparring at the training grounds. Looked like Liu Bei's sword cooldown had ticked down.
"Ooh!! Those are the four Peach Garden siblings... and Zhao Zilong!" The soldiers behind shouted, eyes gleaming.
No, don't lump me in as one of the four. I told you I'm not!
"Heh. A lord who risks his life on the front lines..." Zhao Yun nodded approvingly, then turned to me.
"You're one of us from Mount Changshan Swordsmanship now, Kim Gong. Let's raise the school's name together!" Zhao Yun's eyes sparkled as she yelled.
"Ah... sure." By that logic, Zhao Yun and I were like senior-junior siblings too.
"Open the main gate!!" Liu Bei and his generals, plus a small elite squad of sword-wielders, gathered at the gate.
I'd brought the Kim Squad along, of course. They all looked in good shape, and if I commanded while fighting, they'd farm EXP steadily.
Dr-r-r-rumble!!
As the gates swung open, the vanguard generals—including me—spurred our horses into a mad charge.
"You big-eared bastard who stole Xuzhou with a single tear!!!" Yuan Shu bellowed at Liu Bei.
"A single tear? You spout nonsense without knowing shit!" Liu Bei laughed, pointing his sword at Yuan Shu.
"But you're right— one tear isn't enough. We need your blood and flesh too!!!! That'll do it!!" Liu Bei shot back coldly.
True to his hood origins as Dong Zhuo's adopted kin, Liu Bei's gangster flow was on point.
"Who'll take that big-eared fucker's head!!!" Yuan Shu roared in fury.
"Wooooaaargh!!!" Yuan Shu's troops charged with furious yells.
Clop-clop!!
I surged ahead first.
Time to flex Mount Changshan Swordsmanship's passive: Gentlemanly Wind. It turned attacks on mooks into wide-area Musou-style sweeps.
Clop-clop!! Shing.
Reins in one hand, sword in the other, I twisted my waist mid-gallop and unleashed a full-power slash.
Whoosh.
Yuan Shu's soldiers thrust weapons to unhorse me, but my horse's charge was faster.
Spluuuurt!!!
The sweeping slash shredded their flesh in all directions. Blood fountains erupted in my wake.
Splat!! Splat!!
In a trance, I cleaved a path. Ma Chao's speed plus Namun Sword's cutting power let me bulldoze wildly. Right now, I was Xuzhou's grim reaper.
Kirring.
I lost count of kills as the blue glow on my Namun Sword faded—durability at its limit.
Shing.
Sheathed it quick. It'd auto-repair after some time in the scabbard.
"Gwang Yeom!!" I called to Gwang Yeom behind.
"Yes!! General!!" Gwang Yeom flashed his shiny bald head and tossed me a backup weapon. I'd ordered our strongest member to carry spares.
It was a spear—not bad for mowing down foes.
"Urraaagh!" Gripping it, I triggered Mount Changshan Swordsmanship's active skill.
"Gahk!!!" I stabbed a nearby Yuan Shu soldier's gut, then spun the spear like a windmill with him impaled.
Thwack!! Bwack!!
The polearm, weighted by his body at the tip, scattered the front ranks. Reverse Heaven—one of Mount Changshan Swordsmanship's spear techs. Simple: lift a basic enemy and swing to hit others.
"Kuhek!! Gahk!! Kehk!!" Enemies scattered amid screams.
"Die!!!" Guan He, Gwang Yeom, Mok Lan led the backup at my rear, while Chun Seol, Gwang Yeom—no, Chun Seol and the old northerner guarded our squad's flanks.
Crack.
One tech and the spear was nearly shattered. The dangling corpse had flown off somewhere.
Whiiiiiish!!!
I hurled the disposable spear with Bi Seok Throw.
Thuuuunk!!!
A soldier's head exploded on impact.
"What kinda beastly fighting is that...?" "Some barbarian foreigner, huh." "R-Retreat for now...!!" Their morale cracked; Yuan Shu's troops facing me looked grim.
They tried fleeing around me, but no paradise awaits the cowards. Truth is, I was the real angel here.
"Die!!! You gotta pay for stomping on our turf!!!" Zhang Fei shredded enemies with his eighteen-foot snake spear like a maniac.
Shing.
Guan Yu harvested steel-clad foes silently with her Green Dragon Crescent Blade.
Splat.
Between them, Liu Bei advanced straight for Yuan Shu, neatly slicing stragglers.
Ahead of them all was Zhao Yun, stabbing and sweeping from every blind spot like eyes in the back of her head, skewering foes.
Few in number and total scrubs otherwise, but the Liu Bei Army could fight.
"Ngh!! Sun Jian!!! Cover me now!!" Yuan Shu yanked his chariot back, yelling. Flailing in a numbers disadvantage—proof his command sucked. Despite the edge, he couldn't gain traction.
"Everyone!! Target the generals!!!" As Sun Jian's men grudgingly moved to cover—
"All units, retreat!!!" Liu Bei bellowed instantly.
Our goal was maintaining Xuzhou's bluff. Instilling fear checked the first box.
Our elite squad had gone all-out intercepting; pushing further meant overextending. We scattered in perfect order.
As Sun Jian's cheers echoed from afar, Xuzhou's gates slammed shut. Mi Fang loosed arrows from the walls in support—dumping our last reserves. Pummeled by the volley, Sun Jian's forces had no choice but to pull back.
'Nailed the morale crush.' We'd shown Xuzhou wasn't easy pickings. A small-timer like Yuan Shu might rethink after the losses—or blame Sun Jian and spark infighting.
'Game AI's wired that way.' Canon had Yuan Shu and Sun Jian's alliance crumbling fast. Them still teamed up was rare.
Here's hoping they backed off... With optimistic thoughts, I eyed the half-broken siege line.
------
Meanwhile, Yuan Shu was chewing out Sun Jian.
"We could've hit 'em together from the start—why'd you show up so damn late?! Huh?!" Yuan Shu snapped.
"I didn't expect Duke Gong's lines to crumble so fast. My oversight," Sun Jian said, adjusting his tiger-pelt helmet.
Courteous tone, but laced with shade—like didn't know you were this weak.
"Hey, you son of a bitch." Yuan Shu grabbed for his collar, then dropped his trembling fist.
"But that fight taught me one thing," Sun Jian said, eyeing Yuan Shu.
"What."
"Fewer arrows today than yesterday's barrage... Means they're running low. No siege gear in Xuzhou, I'd bet." Sun Jian's voice was ice-cold. He might suck elsewhere, but war? His brain spun perfectly. That's how he crushed foes with tricks.
"That means..." "Just a skeleton crew besides the sortie. Worth gambling on a rush?" One mad wall-scaling frenzy might do it.
"Hmm. Maybe." Yuan Shu seemed tempted.
They decided to rest the day, then mass for a siege tomorrow.
But... some folks are doomed by the heavens, I guess.
Two days into the siege, Yuan Shu's army faced a heavenly disaster.
"Where's the irreverent fuck who flicked Lu Bu away!!!" "Die!!!" "Wooooaaargh!!!" The midlands' top general, wielding Xiliang cavalry like limbs, struck the allied camp.
"Lu Bu Fengxian will handle you herself!!!" Lu Bu's ghostly cry chilled the air.
"Fuck..." Yuan Shu, half-dressed in armor after scrambling from bed, made a miserable face.